Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

missathegirlwond

Offline (19 hours ago) | Search for a member

missathegirlwond

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5309
  • Number of comments : 62
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About missathegirlwond : I’m the illegitimate love-child of Strategy and Creativity. Now neither parent admits to having me…

missathegirlwond's page activity

Visits<b>jonidoe</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 12:49am<b>fallen45078</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 9:38am<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 5:05pm<b>cryssycakesx3</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 2:49am<b>notachinesewoman</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 1:34am<b>moonstruckwolf</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 1:27am<b>Language_girl97</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 12:44pm<b>NessieMonster188</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 3:27pm<b>brewmasterg</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 3:59am<b>Tiger7Meow</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 1:13am<b>PresAgent</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 10:55pm<b>Sahoon</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 8:04pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 2:03am<b>BadLuckDude12345</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 11:04am<b>neeni88</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 1:55am<b>delaneyluke</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 1:20am<b>Trish01</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 3:45pm<b>ters19</b> - the 04/25/2013 at 1:34pm

missathegirlwond's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of missathegirlwond's badges

missathegirlwond's favorite FMLs

Today, during some previews before the new Harry Potter movie, a guy stood up and led the audience in an enthusiastic and rather successful chant "H-A-R-R-Y!". Minutes later when I attempted to do the same thing, I was pelted with half-full bags of popcorn, freezing sodas, and booing. FML

#3897679
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10520) - you deserved it (77227)

On 07/20/2009 at 1:54am - misc - by Chelsea (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out that just because your boyfriend asks you to marry him doesn't mean that he will show up at the wedding. FML

#3890041
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (217445) - you deserved it (13105)

On 07/19/2009 at 9:06pm - love - by Loveless (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told me that so I'd let him have girls in his bedroom. FML

#3842566
432 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35433) - you deserved it (94199)

On 07/17/2009 at 10:00pm - kids - by Pumpkin (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I awoke to my husband donning a gorilla mask in the middle of the night. My kids have been staying in a tent out back for the past few nights, and have complained of a "monster" scaring them. I told them that it was their imagination. My husband says he gets a kick out of it. FML

#3837360
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44500) - you deserved it (6314)

On 07/17/2009 at 6:02pm - kids - by Divorcemenow (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had a check-up with my dermatologist. When I took off my pants, she noticed a small mark on my penis and was concerned. I had to inform her that it was not in fact a mole, but a bruise from getting it stuck in a Snapple bottle two days prior to the check-up. FML

#3686221
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9404) - you deserved it (71737)

On 07/12/2009 at 3:07am - health - by Best-stuf-on-Earth (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the water park, and got in a line on a staircase to get on a waterslide. A couple minutes in, I feel a large amount of warm liquid drip on my head. Seconds later, a crying girl was being lead down the stairs being told that 'everyone wets themselves sometimes'. FML

#3681487
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51116) - you deserved it (2259)

On 07/12/2009 at 12:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I received 7 notifications on facebook. Girls in my grade were commenting on my photo because they knew the location of it. They then started to have a conversation and they planned a whole social event. On my photo. I wasn't invited. FML

#3669068
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46291) - you deserved it (3863)

On 07/11/2009 at 3:27pm - misc - by laurraaa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I snuck into my brother's room to scare him. Just as I was about to go for it, his girlfriend calls. I had to sit there motionless listening to my brother having phone sex, then wait for him to go to sleep and sneak back out to pretend it never happened. FML

#3630061
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21574) - you deserved it (55318)

On 07/10/2009 at 1:27am - intimacy - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I over drafted my account, and I ended up paying an extra 35 bucks for a 1.99 item. It was an application on the iPhone that is supposed to help me keep track of my money. FML

#3578702
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16859) - you deserved it (47583)

On 07/08/2009 at 10:37am - money - by jedd90 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I hit a horrible tee shot from the 18th hole. I decided to use my driver to take my frustration out on a nearby bush. The bees who lived in that bush decided to use their stingers to take out their frustration up inside my golf shorts. FML

#3555037
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11296) - you deserved it (62934)

On 07/07/2009 at 2:19pm - misc - by Jon (man) - United States

Today, I was babysitting. The kids were thirsty, so I poured them both a cup of the green juice I'd found in a jug in their fridge. They downed it in a flash. It wasn't until later on after I'd poured myself a cup and taken a sip, I realized I had given them margarita mix. The kids are 4 and 2. FML

#3515386
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14593) - you deserved it (52464)

On 07/05/2009 at 10:39pm - kids - by smth (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, was my wedding. After eating, I had an urge to fart. I let one rip just before my husband and I were called to do the garter dance. He seductively tried to use his teeth to remove the garter and came out from under my dress dry heaving. I dutch ovened my husband in front of everyone. FML

#3484293
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53029) - you deserved it (23629)

On 07/04/2009 at 5:07pm - love - by DutchOven (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I watched my best friend get married to the guy I have been in love with since the 8th grade. I was the maid of honor, and had to give a toast to the couple. FML

#3465145
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64528) - you deserved it (15790)

On 07/03/2009 at 9:45pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my daughter asked me what is the youngest age at which you should start having sex. Being a good mom, I said that she shouldn't have sex until after she's been married. My daughter then said, "Oh... shoot," and walked away. My daughter is twelve. FML

#3344863
471 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71445) - you deserved it (12523)

On 06/29/2009 at 8:40pm - intimacy - by blazer - United States (Minnesota)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: