Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

missathegirlwond

Online | Search for a member

missathegirlwond

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4967
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About missathegirlwond : I’m the illegitimate love-child of Strategy and Creativity. Now neither parent admits to having me…

missathegirlwond's page activity

Visits<b>cryssycakesx3</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 2:49am<b>notachinesewoman</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 1:34am<b>moonstruckwolf</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 1:27am<b>Language_girl97</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 12:44pm<b>NessieMonster188</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 3:27pm<b>brewmasterg</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 3:59am<b>Tiger7Meow</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 1:13am<b>PresAgent</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 10:55pm<b>Sahoon</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 8:04pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 2:03am<b>BadLuckDude12345</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 11:04am<b>neeni88</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 1:55am<b>delaneyluke</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 1:20am<b>Trish01</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 3:45pm<b>ters19</b> - the 04/25/2013 at 1:34pm<b>chandlerbelacic</b> - the 04/19/2013 at 12:58pm<b>Darkcamzy</b> - the 04/19/2013 at 7:49am<b>butterfly77</b> - the 04/17/2013 at 6:16pm

missathegirlwond's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of missathegirlwond's badges

missathegirlwond's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my husband eating cat food out of the cat bowl dressed in a cat costume. FML

#20577178
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51175) - you deserved it (5642)

On 04/06/2013 at 7:42am - misc - by confusedcatlover (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend has been cheating on me with two different guys. Her incredibly moving excuse was that she was getting "more experience" so she could please me better. FML

#20576526
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40856) - you deserved it (3375)

On 04/05/2013 at 6:58pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, my twelve year-old son thought it would be a good idea to relentlessly shoot the mail truck with a paintball gun in front of all the neighbors. FML

Today, I went to work at a hotel. One of the guests decided to play the piano in the lobby. He's deaf. Unfortunately, I'm not. FML

#20575584
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28393) - you deserved it (6117)

On 04/05/2013 at 12:20am - work - by torturedears (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was babysitting, and after the kids fell asleep I started hiding the Easter candy. They woke up when I was half-done, and it didn't take them long to figure out what was going on. They won't stop crying, and every time I go near them, they scream "LIAR!" FML

#20569899
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32606) - you deserved it (7260)

On 04/01/2013 at 12:02pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while working at a porn store, a group of six people tried to return used toys and penis pumps. Even though you can't return any items, it's still an unfortunately common occurrence. The semen in these particular toys, however, is not. All of them began shouting at me for not refunding them. FML

#20569678
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42917) - you deserved it (6072)

On 04/01/2013 at 7:57am - intimacy - by ohgodwhyyoufreaks (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I went on a blind date that my friend set up for me. It was going pretty good, then he said he was going to go out to smoke. 10 minutes went by and he still hadn't come back. I called my friend and she said he doesn't smoke. FML

#20566826
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36772) - you deserved it (3636)

On 03/30/2013 at 11:29am - misc - by My Life Is Just PERFECT - United States

Today, I was on the toilet, when I noticed I could see my daughter dancing in the other room in the mirror, so I took a picture with my phone. After I uploaded it, people pointed out that I was visible in the picture, sitting on the toilet and smiling. FML

#20566415
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14937) - you deserved it (55887)

On 03/30/2013 at 1:19am - kids - by crunknasty - United States (California)

Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML

#20565460
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44341) - you deserved it (15078)

On 03/29/2013 at 1:18pm - misc - by fucked by sex ed (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while on the way to Florida for spring break, I pointed out to my mom a bright blue car in the rear-view mirror. As the car overtook us, we both got a horrifyingly detailed view of the driver jerking off her passenger. FML

#20565452
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39948) - you deserved it (4702)

On 03/29/2013 at 1:13pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was on a girls' trip in Las Vegas. I met a cute guy at a bar and we were going back to his hotel room together. On the way up, he asked me how much it would cost. FML

#20564361
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43116) - you deserved it (18678)

On 03/28/2013 at 7:58pm - intimacy - by Hooker (woman) - United States

Today, I was eating out with a group of friends and my boyfriend. During the meal, I accidentally took a sip from my male friend's glass. My boyfriend pointed and said, "Babe, you took his drink." My friend responded by putting his arm round me and saying, "Whatever, I took her virginity." FML

#20563680
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64385) - you deserved it (16364)

On 03/28/2013 at 11:11am - intimacy - by everyoneheard (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I got dumped during sex. FML

#20563466
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66434) - you deserved it (9061)

On 03/28/2013 at 6:02am - intimacy - by Bigfatfailure (man) - United States (California)

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

#20562846
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79681) - you deserved it (8236)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, while making love to my boyfriend for the first time, I moaned his name. He freaked out over how I wasn't over my ex, and angrily left. They have the same name. FML

#20555878
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55496) - you deserved it (8118)

On 03/23/2013 at 12:43am - intimacy - by nraecher (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: