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missathegirlwond

Offline (the 11/22/2014 at 12:10am) | Search for a member

missathegirlwond

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5758
  • Number of comments : 62
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About missathegirlwond : I’m the illegitimate love-child of Strategy and Creativity. Now neither parent admits to having me…

missathegirlwond's page activity

Visits<b>klenorris</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 7:25pm<b>jonidoe</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 12:49am<b>fallen45078</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 9:38am<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 5:05pm<b>cryssycakesx3</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 2:49am<b>notachinesewoman</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 1:34am<b>moonstruckwolf</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 1:27am<b>Language_girl97</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 12:44pm<b>NessieMonster188</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 3:27pm<b>brewmasterg</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 3:59am<b>Tiger7Meow</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 1:13am<b>PresAgent</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 10:55pm<b>Sahoon</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 8:04pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 2:03am<b>BadLuckDude12345</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 11:04am<b>neeni88</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 1:55am<b>delaneyluke</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 1:20am<b>Trish01</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 3:45pm

missathegirlwond's FML badges

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of missathegirlwond's badges

missathegirlwond's favorite FMLs

Today, while on vacation, I called my home phone to check the messages. Someone answered. FML

#20863583
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45374) - you deserved it (2408)

On 09/01/2013 at 7:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while I was teaching my chickens to eat out of my hand, one of the hens bit my finger and I dropped the entire handful of treats. Result: bonanza for the bird. The rest decided they could get more treats by biting me rather than by behaving. I now have a flock of fingerbiters. FML

Today, I announced my engagement. My mother's response was to freak out and demand that I postpone my wedding indefinitely. Why? My younger sister caught the bouquet at a wedding last year, so "she has to get married first!" My sister has been single for 3 years and showers once a week. FML

#20858539
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48809) - you deserved it (2575)

On 08/28/2013 at 10:21pm - love - by marryinghimanyway (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I noticed that my new shampoo had an unfamiliar pink color to it. After some investigation, I found a dead mouse that had apparently cut itself on the bottle pump. I've been washing my hair with mouse blood. FML

#20825465
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56140) - you deserved it (4918)

On 08/07/2013 at 12:34pm - misc - by shampoomice (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML

#20805312
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56203) - you deserved it (9321)

On 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by turning red - United States

Today, I called a tree removal company to have my diseased elm removed. When I got home from work, I was surprised to find it still there. Not as surprised as my neighbor was to discover that his tree was missing, nor as surprised as his children when they saw there was no more tree-house. FML

#20790198
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53648) - you deserved it (4013)

On 07/18/2013 at 10:38am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, one of my cats gave birth. My other cat responded by eating the new litter in a jealous rage, then got indigestion and vomited. I had to clean up regurgitated kittens. FML

Today, I was playing Monopoly with my kids. It was fun, and led to some mock fights. My neighbor, who despises me for being a single mother, used it as an excuse to call the cops on me for "abusing" my kids. They were too confused to do anything but nod at the officer's accusing questions. FML

#20779851
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51148) - you deserved it (3278)

On 07/13/2013 at 12:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Puerto Rico

Today, I woke up to a strange noise. I looked over to see my drunk husband standing at the dresser. I asked him what he was doing. "Peeing." I asked him, "In the sock drawer?" There was a pause. "Am I peeing in the wrong drawer?" FML

#20779714
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51251) - you deserved it (4232)

On 07/13/2013 at 10:32am - misc - by speechless - United States (Indiana)

Today, my girlfriend and I were at the movies. When the "love scene" came on, she leaned over and made out with the wrong man. FML

#20779631
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62904) - you deserved it (4961)

On 07/13/2013 at 9:20am - love - by a man - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at a music festival, and my mum had told me not to to drink. Someone threw a cup of beer at me, and I was worried about smelling of alcohol. It's okay though, because a second cup of urine took the alcohol smell right away. FML

#20779336
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47987) - you deserved it (3976)

On 07/13/2013 at 3:14am - misc - by Festivaler - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

Today, the guy I like asked me what he should do for the girl he has a crush on. I told him to give her flowers and tell her how he feels. Later that day my doorbell rang, and he stood there holding flowers. He said the magical words, "My car broke down, can you give me a lift?" FML

#20778979
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63604) - you deserved it (4750)

On 07/13/2013 at 12:22am - love - by Stacy (woman) - United States

Today, my dog decided to poop while inside a revolving door. Before I could do anything, the door swung around and smeared it everywhere. My dog excels at timing. FML

#20770214
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44193) - you deserved it (4212)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:19am - animals - by PerfectTiming - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, my mother had a full-on hissy fit because of the clothes I was wearing. Not because she thought they were inappropriate, but because I was "stealing her look." FML

#20769263
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39685) - you deserved it (3118)

On 07/07/2013 at 7:41pm - misc - by malicious_melons - United States (California)

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

#20769088
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52914) - you deserved it (9147)

On 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm - kids - by nosestealer (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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