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mexicotoucher

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mexicotoucher
  • Town/Country : Auckland , New Zealand
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1248
  • Number of comments : 143
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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mexicotoucher's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming, "Fuck you cops! I can drive under the influence if I want to!" It took me a second to realize it was my mother. FML

#16474078
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40121) - you deserved it (2868)

On 06/02/2011 at 9:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went speed dating. I arrived at my first date and she looked me up and down and said, "Oh, that's awkward." FML

#16473954
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25823) - you deserved it (3182)

On 06/02/2011 at 9:01pm - love - by nikto (man) -

Today, I got kneed in the stomach by a sixth grader. I couldn't breathe. I have a black belt in Taekwondo. FML

#16452469
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25553) - you deserved it (13585)

On 06/01/2011 at 2:44pm - misc - by Stiny (man) - United States

Today, my daughter turned 18. She decided to use this day to tell me everywhere her and her boyfriends have had sex in my house to get revenge for being overprotective. FML

#16451971
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20615) - you deserved it (56144)

On 06/01/2011 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, as I was driving to work, I glanced in my rear view mirror to see an old man behind me using binoculars to see in front of him since we were stuck in a huge traffic jam. He rear ended me. FML

#16451078
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25343) - you deserved it (2341)

On 06/01/2011 at 12:43pm - misc - by trafficfail (woman) -

Today, I fell asleep in class. I'm the teacher. FML

#16450721
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12881) - you deserved it (39210)

On 06/01/2011 at 12:05pm - work - by quickfingers100 - United Kingdom

Today, I was slammed onto my car, thrown on the ground, and arrested for outstanding warrants from 1979. I was born in 1992. FML

#16449288
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61488) - you deserved it (3349)

On 06/01/2011 at 9:30am - misc - by aarone23 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I had to give a reference for a former employee. I tried to say he was always willing to give us a hand on the job. Instead, I said he was always willing to give us hand-jobs. FML

#16448858
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13236) - you deserved it (20299)

On 06/01/2011 at 8:35am - intimacy - by Username - Canada

Today, I found out that the school principal takes all the money from the school fund raisers to buy herself donuts. I'd donated over $100. FML

#16447988
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32065) - you deserved it (3737)

On 06/01/2011 at 5:20am - money - by Golden~ - Canada (Ontario)

Today, the elevator in my apartment building broke down. I live on the 30th floor and am still climbing the stairs. FML

#16447719
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29427) - you deserved it (3582)

On 06/01/2011 at 4:09am - misc - by Username - Singapore

Today, I wrote in my own yearbook with different styles of handwriting so my mom would think I have friends. FML

#16445488
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44989) - you deserved it (11915)

On 06/01/2011 at 12:28am - misc - by nofriends - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, my boyfriend refused to take me out on our three year anniversary because he was busy, "training to become a professional gamer." FML

#16441244
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27302) - you deserved it (6359)

On 05/31/2011 at 8:50pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Brazil

Today, my 12 year old cousin decided that "all men are pigs" and deleted every male contact in my phone. FML

#16434926
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34603) - you deserved it (4214)

On 05/31/2011 at 12:47pm - kids - by Ann - United States (Michigan)

Today, I accidentally said, "Yes, Sir." to my female teacher. I then apologized by saying, "Sorry, Sir." FML

#16418676
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31174) - you deserved it (14385)

On 05/30/2011 at 2:14pm - misc - by OopsKid (man) - France

Today, my second roommate in less then a week got a DUI. Both roommates are demanding that I drive them around for free until they get their licenses back, or else they won't have the funds to pay their rent. FML

#16418621
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32138) - you deserved it (3149)

On 05/30/2011 at 2:11pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Iowa)



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