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mduerden

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mduerden

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 20 May 1977 (37 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 275
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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mduerden's page activity

Visits<b>mt631</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 3:59pm<b>weedle99</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 9:46pm<b>KatieMajestic</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 4:39pm<b>Redhex52</b> - the 09/19/2013 at 10:11pm<b>katdaiken</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 7:31pm<b>graceinsheepwear</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 1:07pm<b>SleeplessBeauty</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 5:19am<b>SMurphy501</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 2:33pm<b>abec</b> - the 06/09/2013 at 2:22pm<b>WizardofWaxinAss</b> - the 06/09/2013 at 11:24am<b>farrahls</b> - the 06/09/2013 at 10:13am<b>JillianBall</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 9:54pm<b>coried91</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 1:17pm<b>MrSassypants</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 12:56pm<b>rs31831</b> - the 05/21/2013 at 7:56pm<b>PiNkMoOn</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 2:54am<b>BookSprite</b> - the 05/13/2013 at 10:04pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 05/13/2013 at 3:35pm

mduerden's FML badges

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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mduerden's favorite FMLs

Today, I was caught "experimenting" with my friend at his house. His parents called mine, and my dad came to drive me home. On the way back, he tried to cheer me up by saying, "Son, don't be ashamed. When I was your age, I sucked a few dicks myself." Thanks for the info, Dad. FML

#20539287
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49356) - you deserved it (24430)

On 03/11/2013 at 7:33am - intimacy - by ugh (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because he didn't trust himself not to cheat on me. What? FML

#20526676
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36083) - you deserved it (3710)

On 03/01/2013 at 7:02am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after having sex, my girlfriend left my apartment after furiously ranting at me, because I made her come "too many times" and that it's "unfair" to her. What? FML

Today, my fiancé came home drunk with some girl. Then he told her that I was his sister. FML

#19287626
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39977) - you deserved it (3268)

On 03/16/2012 at 6:38am - love - by elisabeth_pwnes - Norway (Vestfold)

Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML

Today, in the midst of having sex, my boyfriend decided that, as a joke, he would pretend to be a zombie whilst going down on me. Sadly, the thought turned me so much that I came. This was the first orgasm he's ever given me in over a year of dating. FML

#19064063
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31990) - you deserved it (6160)

On 02/13/2012 at 8:37am - intimacy - by lotrgeek (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because, I "always wear that stupid little hat." I'm Jewish. FML

#19062488
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37830) - you deserved it (9642)

On 02/13/2012 at 1:00am - love - by Kevin (man) - United States

Today, I realized that I probably have anger issues. I came to this conclusion after I finished screaming abuse at the microwave for beeping before I could hit the off switch. FML

#19058382
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8113) - you deserved it (24623)

On 02/12/2012 at 4:50pm - misc - by fuck teh poleese (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I sat in my boss' office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML

#19042299
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8557) - you deserved it (65120)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:33pm - work - by great - United States

Today, my husband and I worked together on a very difficult yard project. Afterwards, I thanked him and offered him a special treat. He was disappointed to find I meant sex, not cookies. FML

#18992832
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30353) - you deserved it (5221)

On 02/04/2012 at 2:40pm - intimacy - by me - United States (Texas)

Today, I tried to treat a cut on my butt hole with Neosporin. I couldn't see it properly, so I had to use the front-facing camera on my phone. FML

#18973546
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19094) - you deserved it (6145)

On 02/01/2012 at 11:57pm - health - by 11niko (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML

#18954927
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30752) - you deserved it (4961)

On 01/30/2012 at 7:25pm - intimacy - by ugh (man) - United States

Today, after sex, my boyfriend turned to me and said, "You know, sometimes, you look like Kevin Spacey." FML

#18832495
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24319) - you deserved it (3189)

On 01/17/2012 at 3:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Libyan Arab Jamahiriya

Today, my girlfriend told me there was good news and bad news. Bad news: she's pregnant. Good news: I'm probably not the father. FML

#18728659
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46828) - you deserved it (3869)

On 01/06/2012 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was heading to the beach with my mom following. I went through a yellow light and got a call from her complaining that I had left her. So, I made it a point to stop at the next yellow light. She rear-ended me. FML



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