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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
mckibben's favorite FMLs
by shameless / 04/28/2013 at 6:24pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
Today, I had to go to the hospital for an allergic reaction. Turns out, I'm highly allergic to cherry blossoms. My wife and I just bought a house and moved into a new neighborhood. Almost every block in this neighborhood, including my own, has rows and rows of cherry blossom trees. FML
by verycherryfucked / 04/28/2013 at 6:10pm / United States (New York) / Health
Today, I summoned the courage to call my abusive mother-in-law about her non-payment of the money I stupidly lent her last year. She replied, "Why don't you go deepthroat a cactus, then we'll talk about it, cunt." and then hung up on me. FML
by a tad whipped / 04/28/2013 at 4:44pm / Australia / Money
Today, my parents threatened to kick me out of the house if I didn't agree to convert to their new brand of Christianity. This is a day after they ranted at me about how I should speak my mind more and not let myself be controlled by other people. FML
by Anonymous / 04/28/2013 at 4:19pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/28/2013 at 3:53pm / Saudi Arabia / Intimacy
Today, I overheard my boyfriend telling his buddies that the main reason he got into video game modding was so he could put a virtual version of me in his games and "shoot the fuck out of that bitch". FML
by gibbette / 04/28/2013 at 1:32pm / United Arab Emirates (Dubai) / Love
Today, for the third time this week, a telemarketer called me. Seriously annoyed, I told him in German that I don't speak English, in an attempt to get rid of him. He then started delivering his product pitch in German. FML
by Anonymous / 04/28/2013 at 9:57am / China (Shanghai) / Miscellaneous
by Beth / 04/28/2013 at 9:16am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was in the middle of having a shower when I noticed a camera hidden in the corner of the room pointing directly towards the shower which I stood in butt-naked. I live by myself and have recently only moved in. FML
by wtfisgoingon / 04/28/2013 at 6:30am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous
by msarosi / 04/28/2013 at 6:28am / Canada (Ontario) / Health
Today, I missed multiple calls from the company I applied to. That was the supervisor calling, wanting to hire me. I then remembered my idiotic voicemail I made months ago where I pretended to answer and say stupid stuff for 5 minutes. I don't think I'm going to get the job. FML
by stupid voicemails / 04/28/2013 at 5:09am / United States (Hawaii) / Work
by lonesome / 04/28/2013 at 1:23am / Canada / Miscellaneous
Today, six weeks before my wedding, my mother decided to claim that she never agreed on paying for it and that she doesn't think she will. Now I have six weeks to scavenge enough cash for the wedding she planned in the first place. FML
by need_cash_now / 04/28/2013 at 12:29am / United States / Money
by gross. / 04/27/2013 at 11:25pm / United States (Mississippi) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to explain to a friend that the show writers for Glee did not write "Bohemian Rhapsody" and that Freddie Mercury did not steal the song from them. We're both 17 years old, and she reacted by kicking a chair at me. FML
by Anonymous / 04/27/2013 at 11:16pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous