Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

mckibben

Search for a member

mckibben

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 2 February 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1403
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About mckibben : on the app...hit me up if you wanna talk or know anything 610 550 9876

mckibben's page activity

Visits<b>dead_insects</b> - the 06/11/2013 at 7:04am<b>A7XCamaro</b> - the 03/31/2013 at 3:48am<b>Michaelmore</b> - the 03/31/2013 at 3:03am<b>JinxedPixie</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 8:30pm<b>Futacy</b> - the 08/25/2012 at 9:12pm<b>AholeCop</b> - the 08/25/2012 at 8:24am

mckibben's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of mckibben's badges

mckibben's favorite FMLs

Today, I was berated by a pharmacist, who said that kids these days are on so many unnecessary medications for "fake diseases". I was just trying to pick up the medication I've been prescribed to control my epilepsy. FML

Today, I gave a big presentation to my class. It included PowerPoint slides and video clips of the country I'd been researching. Another student did a presentation on the same country, except he just read from its Wikipedia page. He practically got a standing ovation. I got a single clap. FML

#20638884
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42975) - you deserved it (3315)

On 05/03/2013 at 12:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boss fired me for acting "inappropriately" at work. I gave him a hug. He's my dad. FML

#20638777
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64938) - you deserved it (7893)

On 05/03/2013 at 11:00am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was hitting on a cute girl on the bus. It was going well, and she gave me her name to add on Facebook. Since I didn't have the app, I opened Safari on my phone. It opened to my video from Pornhub I watched yesterday and started playing, on full volume, through the entire bus. FML

#20638691
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25609) - you deserved it (67647)

On 05/03/2013 at 9:23am - misc - by acnecream - Finland (Eastern Finland)

Today, my wife told me that getting in the mood to have sex with me is like trying to get in the mood to hit the treadmill. FML

#20638629
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56175) - you deserved it (7742)

On 05/03/2013 at 8:13am - intimacy - by Who1s269 (man) - United States

Today, I was feeling down about being stuck in bed after ankle surgery. I thought I would go ahead and call my boss and let him know everything went well. He said the obligatory nice things, then told me that if I'm not at work on Monday, I'll be fired. I can't even get out of bed. FML

#20638400
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44552) - you deserved it (3039)

On 05/03/2013 at 1:35am - work - by clutzasaurus (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, marks the third week in which my girlfriend has gone without taking a shower. She does this every so often, taking showers roughly once per month. She's convinced baby wipes will "hold her over". FML

#20638375
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52770) - you deserved it (9003)

On 05/03/2013 at 1:16am - love - by SingleStrongArm - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60441) - you deserved it (9132)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend dumped me for cheating on her. Her "proof" was an image of me making out with a girl. Pretty damning, except she loaded it up in Photoshop, where I saw the image layers she'd used to fake the whole thing. I'm not sure what the hell she was thinking either. FML

#20637622
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53568) - you deserved it (3506)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:16pm - love - by psycho ex (man) - Brazil

Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML

#20637584
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69776) - you deserved it (7851)

On 05/02/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by future brain bleach addict (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I'm on holiday in Ghana. After having worn an anklet I bought here for the past two weeks, I was told that it's used by the local prostitutes to advertise their trade. FML

#20637157
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45970) - you deserved it (7141)

On 05/02/2013 at 3:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, I met my boyfriend's mom for the first time. I introduced myself and went to shake her hand. She looked me up and down and said, "I don't shake hands with whores." FML

#20636996
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60704) - you deserved it (7092)

On 05/02/2013 at 2:27pm - love - by Jes_jes18 (woman) - United States

Today, my sister texted me, saying she was about to go into surgery. It's been a long time coming, and we've both been worried about what could happen. I texted "good luck" back. My phone autocorrected it to "goodbye" and I didn't even notice. FML

#20636856
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53439) - you deserved it (7504)

On 05/02/2013 at 12:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I learned my husband has what he calls "grumpy wife sex" specifically to cheer me up. I don't know if I'm more annoyed that he casually mentioned it after we've been together for 10 years, or that it actually works. FML

#20636797
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45187) - you deserved it (13398)

On 05/02/2013 at 11:59am - intimacy - by MommaAnnie (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my future father-in-law showed everyone a picture of his poop because it was "shaped like a banana." My fiancé's whole family thought it was funny and "looked more like a banana than last time." FML

#20636739
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40604) - you deserved it (3864)

On 05/02/2013 at 11:04am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: