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mamaklm

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mamaklm

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Monday 13 July 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 439
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About mamaklm : Rockin n a Rollin

mamaklm's page activity

Visits<b>sierralem</b> - the 01/25/2012 at 1:12am<b>sinnikle</b> - the 03/23/2011 at 10:29am<b>fthku</b> - the 03/22/2011 at 8:47pm<b>killakiwi</b> - the 03/22/2011 at 4:35pm<b>Cinn</b> - the 03/22/2011 at 4:06pm<b>Soup</b> - the 03/15/2011 at 11:45am

mamaklm's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

mamaklm's favorite FMLs

Today, I drove to the liquor store completely naked except for my dressing gown, with a carload of idiot stoners who ran in and stole vodka, tequila and whiskey. We drank in a bush. Last week I was a good citizen, and now I'm white trash. I'm not quite sure what happened in between. FML

#17908235
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7373) - you deserved it (57452)

On 10/04/2011 at 11:28pm - misc - by danii - Reserved

Today, while I was trying to explain to my friend how smoking weed everyday doesn't make you stupid, I forgot what I was talking about mid-sentence. FML

#16077554
482 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14066) - you deserved it (83489)

On 05/07/2011 at 11:29am - misc - by BCBUDDY - United States (Florida)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69626) - you deserved it (6562)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I dozed off during a lecture. When I woke up, I didn't recognize any of the people surrounding me, and I saw one guy pointing and laughing at me. It turns out, my professor instructed everyone to let me sleep because he wanted to see how long it would be before I woke up. I was asleep three hours. FML

#14650881
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9641) - you deserved it (29365)

On 01/20/2011 at 3:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, it's my sixteenth birthday. The only gift I got was a bill from my parents. Apparently, the rent is due on the 1st. FML

#14251637
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29014) - you deserved it (2784)

On 12/18/2010 at 8:02pm - misc - by Dopeboyfresh71 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to the Salvation Army to donate some clothes. As I was handing over the 4 huge bags that I had carried for 10 blocks, while 6 months pregnant, somebody stole my purse. FML

#14211022
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38013) - you deserved it (3204)

On 12/15/2010 at 6:58am - misc - by mugged (woman) - Germany (Hessen)

Today, when I got home, I went into my room to find a Bratz doll and a Ken doll laying naked, on top of each other on my bed. Attached to them was a note that stated, "Please, use your imagination and find other ways besides porn to get excited. The computer keeps getting viruses. Love, Mom." FML

#13927798
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17511) - you deserved it (48399)

On 11/21/2010 at 6:43pm - intimacy - by sydysyd (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, a guy asked for my number. He used the rather annoying "You know, this iPhone has everything... but you know the only thing that's missing is your number." I might have given it to him, if he did have the iPhone, not the makeshift box of Mini Wheat Thins he had in his hand. FML

#13502954
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20494) - you deserved it (5189)

On 10/18/2010 at 8:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up thinking after wearing glasses and contacts all my life that I had miraculously been corrected to 20/20. Turns out I had just fallen asleep with my contacts in. FML

#8287074
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9217) - you deserved it (27997)

On 02/15/2010 at 2:44am - health - by kiriakousauce21 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I panicked when I felt a hard bump on the side of my stomach. I thought I had appendicitis. Turns out it was my ab muscles. I've been overweight so long I didn't know what they felt like. FML

#8063037
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7851) - you deserved it (22694)

On 02/09/2010 at 8:16pm - health - by conchita (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my mom asked me to clean beneath my brother's bed for money. I found a rotten apple, a picture of my best friend, and a dead bird. I got $10. FML

#7420452
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27367) - you deserved it (4230)

On 01/18/2010 at 3:04pm - kids - by Brotherssuckkk - Sent from mobile version

Today, I waited anxiously until midnight to open Christmas presents. As the clock struck midnight, I ran out into the living room, super excited to open my presents, only to discover that everyone in my house had already opened their presents and gone to bed. FML

#6931978
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23205) - you deserved it (4714)

On 12/25/2009 at 12:18am - misc - by iFail (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I listened to a woman take an extremely fragrant crap while I waited for my pregnacy test result in the Target bathroom. FML

#6732796
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22978) - you deserved it (21700)

On 12/13/2009 at 1:26am - health - by teeeessst (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I fell asleep with my hands down my pants. I woke up to an excruciating pain coming from my genitalea. It turns out that I was having nightmares and I squeezed my balls because I was so terrified. I popped 3 blood vessels in my scrotum and now walk with a limp. FML

#6635616
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23539) - you deserved it (9515)

On 12/06/2009 at 3:42pm - intimacy - by Ballhugger (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my son told me he lost the envelope with all the money he earned selling Cub Scout popcorn. The popcorn was delivered already, and the money needs to be turned in to the pack leader tonight. I just spent $220 on popcorn my neighbors are eating. FML

#5989748
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26913) - you deserved it (4929)

On 10/25/2009 at 11:44am - misc - by ifyouseekmylife (woman) - United States (Texas)



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