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malters
  • Town/Country : Ontario, canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 18 January 1995 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 2161
  • Number of comments : 55
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About malters : Glad to know that I'm not the only stalker in the world. No I'm not a grammar Nazi but if you cant speak english I may kill you :)

You've probably clicked me because:
I was a complete dick to you
i was a complete dick to someone else and you thought it was funny
or you like my picture

now scram!

malters's last visitors

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malters's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad got drunk and thought it would be a great idea to clean up the yard by dumping gasoline all over the leaves and lighting our entire front yard on fire. FML

#18334271
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22619) - you deserved it (1596)

On 11/24/2011 at 3:42am - misc - by JWhite - United States (California)

Today, my school voted for a Pokémon theme for this year's homecoming. FML

#17773811
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30039) - you deserved it (15041)

On 09/18/2011 at 5:16pm - misc - by ohgodwhy - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I had a cop pull me over because he claimed that he saw me taking a bunch of colorful pills at the previous stop sign. I was eating skittles. FML

#17502057
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32600) - you deserved it (2027)

On 08/17/2011 at 5:50pm - misc - by candymansvan17 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I got a flat tire in the middle of nowhere. I called AAA, and they said it would take 2 hours to get there. They called 2 hours later saying they got a flat tire and would be there in another 2 hours. FML

#17499857
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35498) - you deserved it (2708)

On 08/17/2011 at 12:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out that the crazy old man that sleep walks naked around my neighborhood every night is my grandpa. And he's not sleepwalking. FML

#17340162
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29191) - you deserved it (2305)

On 08/02/2011 at 2:46am - misc - by Username - United States

Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML

#17338982
326 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36940) - you deserved it (10875)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:58am - kids - by ohcrap - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was at the airport. A creepy man smiled at me, so I politely smiled back. I then realized his shirt said "Smile if you take it in the ass." He then winked at me and walked off. FML

#17315983
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34540) - you deserved it (11899)

On 07/31/2011 at 1:11am - intimacy - by creepedout - United States

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML

#17194109
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46704) - you deserved it (7666)

On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States

Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume. FML

#17044811
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34952) - you deserved it (4836)

On 07/09/2011 at 8:19pm - money - by Lame (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my drunk father chased me down the street with my little brother's light saber screaming, "Come back Yoda! Teach me how to use the force!" FML

#17023204
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30936) - you deserved it (3405)

On 07/08/2011 at 1:23am - misc - by Yoda (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was working the drive-thru at McDonalds, and as I handed out a Diet coke to the customer, the man started growling and yelled "HULK SMASH!" He smashed the cup with two fists and drove off. I was drenched in soda. FML

#16827191
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34063) - you deserved it (4374)

On 06/24/2011 at 12:46am - work - by Sam (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my marriage counselor got divorced. FML

#16725425
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34695) - you deserved it (3401)

On 06/18/2011 at 4:51am - love - by screwed - United States

Today, as I was smoking a cigarette I realized that it's time to quit. This realization came to me after a particularly violent coughing bout forced not tar out of my lungs, but rather poo out of my bum. FML

#16701794
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8430) - you deserved it (41645)

On 06/16/2011 at 9:39pm - health - by Hopslammer (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was walking to class, when a kid came up behind me and smacked me in the face a few times until I fell to the ground. I rolled over and he said, "Oh shit! Wrong person, my bad." FML

#16676929
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40521) - you deserved it (3127)

On 06/15/2011 at 12:42pm - health - by Braxam - United States

Today, I watched my boss try to stick a magnet to cardboard. FML

#16671761
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33733) - you deserved it (3163)

On 06/15/2011 at 1:46am - work - by MegaBear - United States



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