About malters : Glad to know that I'm not the only stalker in the world. No I'm not a grammar Nazi but if you cant speak english I may kill you :)
You've probably clicked me because:
I was a complete dick to you
i was a complete dick to someone else and you thought it was funny
or you like my picture
now scram!
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, I came home from work to find a burglar in my house. He then said that he was just leaving, and went back out of the broken window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20325) - you deserved it (1371)
On 04/02/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30459) - you deserved it (8685)
On 03/25/2012 at 8:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, after a nice swim at the local pool, I ran into a naked girl in the showers. She screamed, kicked me in the nuts and ran off. I still have no clue what she was doing in the men's shower room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28606) - you deserved it (1724)
On 02/29/2012 at 2:18pm - misc - by ouch (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)
Today, my husband and I worked together on a very difficult yard project. Afterwards, I thanked him and offered him a special treat. He was disappointed to find I meant sex, not cookies. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25018) - you deserved it (4630)
On 02/04/2012 at 2:40pm - intimacy - by me - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend confessed to me that he purposely makes me angry, because when I'm angry, I clean, and it saves him having to do it himself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23220) - you deserved it (4293)
On 02/02/2012 at 3:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)
Today, I realized the universal beauty that can be found in a pancake. I'm not sure if I have reached spiritual enlightenment, or if I should have my head examined. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12801) - you deserved it (4855)
On 01/23/2012 at 6:27am - health - by Dutchee - Netherlands (Friesland)
Today, my girlfriend hummed the Jeopardy theme while I was trying to undo her bra. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23280) - you deserved it (17420)
On 01/15/2012 at 7:52am - intimacy - by joeshmoe - United States (Washington)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, saying we're too different. His only example? He likes ham and I don't. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24170) - you deserved it (2947)
On 12/11/2011 at 11:46pm - love - by PunkChik27 - United States (Ohio)
Today, I got to say, "My best friend hooked up with my step-sister's grandma's aunt" and be correct. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20541) - you deserved it (1632)
On 12/09/2011 at 12:22am - love - by thatisnotcool45 - Canada
Today, at work, an overweight man riding an electric cart started peeing all around the store. I had to clean it up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22599) - you deserved it (1410)
On 11/29/2011 at 12:34am - work - by kait - United States (New York)
Today, at work, an overweight man riding an electric cart started peeing all around the store. I had to clean it up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22599) - you deserved it (1410)
On 11/29/2011 at 12:34am - work - by kait - United States (New York)
Today, I saw Santa. He gave me the finger. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20141) - you deserved it (4542)
On 11/28/2011 at 7:44pm - misc - by moopymoplady - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I saw Santa. He gave me the finger. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20141) - you deserved it (4542)
On 11/28/2011 at 7:44pm - misc - by moopymoplady - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got trapped in an elevator with a chicken. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22841) - you deserved it (2668)
On 11/24/2011 at 5:35am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom
Today, my boyfriend told me that if I ever cheated on him, he'll chop my body up and dispose of all the parts, but keep my boobies, because he likes them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38704) - you deserved it (6357)
On 11/24/2011 at 5:01am - intimacy - by Faithful - Singapore
Monday 17 June 2013
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