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lu95's favorite FMLs
by rr / 08/15/2011 at 11:55am / Canada (Ontario) / Work
Today, while walking home from work, a young teenage girl ran up behind me and dumped a carton of milk on my head. She said, "The cow master baptizes you!" and then ran in the opposite direction, cackling madly. FML
by Anonymous / 07/29/2011 at 8:31pm / United States (Washington) / Health
by frankkathy / 07/26/2011 at 1:07pm / United States (Texas) / Animals
by j / 07/25/2011 at 10:03pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
by flipnazn / 07/15/2011 at 12:24am / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, I have a cold. Trying to clear out my stuffy nose, I tried putting mouthwash in my nose. Thinking it was an awesome idea, I put some more in. I then starting screaming in pain due to the extreme burning in my nostrils. FML
by Fmylife / 07/06/2011 at 5:17am / United States (Washington) / Health
by ashleyrae / 06/29/2011 at 10:55am / United States (Mississippi) / Miscellaneous
Today, in science, we were studying reproduction. Our teacher was reading out the notes and claimed that 'the female's penis stiffens to enter the male's vagina.' I'm supposed to be learning stuff from this woman. FML
by girlshavepenises / 06/28/2011 at 2:39am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Intimacy
by Evaki1 / 06/13/2011 at 10:24am / Greece (Attiki) / Kids
by Rachel / 06/10/2011 at 5:57am / United States (Alabama) / Kids
Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML
by sushi hater / 03/13/2011 at 2:55pm / United States (Colorado) / Health
by awkward / 02/27/2011 at 7:39am / Finland (Southern Finland) / Work
by allgrowedup / 02/11/2011 at 10:10pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, my friend compared my hair color to hers. Also, she braided my hair (two pieces) with hers (one piece). I asked her why and she finally broke down and told me. She has lice and didn't want to be the only one. FML
by Anonymous / 12/26/2010 at 3:12am / United States (California) / Health
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was fired from my job because I, in my bosses words, "Abided by company policy to such an…