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I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Today, I tried to get my wife to have sex with me, she told me she couldn't because she had her period. She's two months pregnant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37596) - you deserved it (8005)
On 04/20/2011 at 12:31pm - intimacy - by Andrew - United States
Today, I tried to get my wife to have sex with me, she told me she couldn't because she had her period. She's two months pregnant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37596) - you deserved it (8005)
On 04/20/2011 at 12:31pm - intimacy - by Andrew - United States
Today, my boss friend requested me on Facebook. My profile picture is of me licking his employee of the month picture for a dare. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8452) - you deserved it (35404)
On 04/15/2011 at 3:51pm - work - by asdfjkl (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I finally found a reason to quit smoking. I threw my cigarette butt out the window and it blew back in, went down the back of my pants, and burnt my butt in 3 different places. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9375) - you deserved it (36517)
On 04/08/2011 at 11:30am - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was in the emergency room. The doctor told me that my injuries and back problems are the intensity of those after a car accident. I slipped on a grape. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29480) - you deserved it (4479)
On 04/08/2011 at 6:35am - health - by ridella -
Today, I was walking along when I saw this girl kissing her boyfriend. I thought to myself "I wish I had a boyfriend like that". I'm a guy, and straight. At least I thought I was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28162) - you deserved it (10025)
On 04/07/2011 at 11:15am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30169) - you deserved it (24883)
On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)
Today, in an attempt to get my son to stop playing Call of Duty, I threw his Xbox controller out the window. He was so desperate, he followed it. His bedroom is on the second floor. My son has 3 broken ribs, and no future. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29937) - you deserved it (43723)
On 03/20/2011 at 9:25pm - kids - by failureparent (man) - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (14072) - you deserved it (66856)
On 03/01/2011 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by Anon. (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10585) - you deserved it (31303)
On 03/01/2011 at 11:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I woke up next to my best friend after lots of drinking and the best sex I've ever had in my life. The only problem is we're both straight males. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42545) - you deserved it (33104)
On 02/19/2011 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59853) - you deserved it (5174)
On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I broke my arm. When I got home from the doctors with my cast, I fell asleep on the couch from the medicine. When I woke up, there were swastikas, "I love the KKK", and multiple penises written all over my cast. My dad thought it would be funny. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26278) - you deserved it (3100)
On 01/28/2011 at 11:10pm - health - by Mervin22 - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I got my wisdom teeth cut out. While my girlfriend was driving me home, I, still being high on the laughing gas, accidentally admitted to cheating on her. She was kind enough to wait until the numbness wore off before she punched me in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6456) - you deserved it (88596)
On 01/28/2011 at 8:06pm - love - by peeoncarl1111 - United States
Today, I went to the park and sat down on a bench to enjoy my coffee. I heard a few young girls behind me talking about how their first experience of sex was. I turned around to see how old these girls really were. One of them was my daughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48191) - you deserved it (5263)
On 01/27/2011 at 10:35pm - intimacy - by JordanVilleneuve (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Monday 20 May 2013
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