Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Offline (the 01/26/2015 at 9:17pm) | Search for a member
About lndala : The list of things that piss me off is way too long to type here in full so I'll just put down some things that really grate my nipples:
1. People who think they are better/smarter than everyone else.
2. Horrific grammar. It's okay if you have a few grammatical errors here and there, but when it's impossible to even begin to understand what you're saying, I have a problem.
3. People who continue to argue the same point even when they know they are wrong (this one is a big one for me).
4. (The biggest of all) People who complain about how social media has stripped us of our human connections, or whatever bullshit they say, when they are the first people to post dumb shit and their entire life story on social media! Just shut up already!
If you are not one of these people (and happen to be a Potterhead too) feel free to message me :)
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today, my pet bunny died. My little sister is distraught and practically suicidal, because apparently she playfully pointed a wand at it a few days ago and said "avada kedavra". She's absolutely convinced that she killed it. FML
Today, my 16-year-old son convinced my 14-year-old daughter that she wasn't allowed to use the ladies bathroom at the shopping centre, because she wasn't wearing a dress like the girl on the sign. He told her girls in pants always used the other one. She believed him. This is my legacy. FML
Today, I went to my cousin's wedding. The groom walked over when the two of us were talking, took one good look at me, slapped me on the ass, and said, "You know, if I wasn't marrying Rose here, you'd be next." Yeah, about that: I'm a 16-year old guy. FML
Today, my sister's boyfriend called while she was out. The second I answered he tried to have phone sex with me. When I explained to him that I wasn't my sister and that we just sound the same on the phone, he replied, "Don't care, let's keep going." FML
Today, I ran over a squirrel. I saw it twitching, so I backed over it to end its suffering. It wasn't a squirrel; it was a kitten. The children it belonged to watched as I ran over their kitten. Twice. FML
Friday 30 January 2015