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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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littlegolferboy

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littlegolferboy
  • Town/Country : Orillia, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 27 February 1985 (26 years)
  • Number of visits : 32298
  • Number of comments : 198
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About littlegolferboy : My life may suck, but it will never suck bad enough for me to post my own FML.

Okay maybe I'll actually put something interesting in here. My name is Peter. I love Discovery Channel and the Fallout series of games. My favourite Star Wars character is Boba Fett, Kaylee will always be hotter than Inara, and I want to enter Samantha Carter's wormhole, if you catch my drift. I play guitar, but it has yet to get me any girls. My dream job is being an air traffic controller, but it's tough to get into so we'll see how that goes.

If I said something that really pissed you off, let me know! I like knowing when my trolling is successful.

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littlegolferboy's favorite FMLs

Today, the instructions on my new IKEA bed made me cry. It includes a picture of a person working alone with a frown crossed out and is replaced by two smiling people working together. I have no one in my life to help me. FML

#7036461 (149)

I agree, your life sucks (29028) - you deserved it (3041)

On 12/30/2009 at 2:07pm - love - by hatelife (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I started growing hair on my upper lip. I'm finally becoming a man! Too bad I'm a 17 year old girl. FML

#6594462 (146)

I agree, your life sucks (28785) - you deserved it (3383)

On 12/04/2009 at 12:55am - health - by harry (woman) - Hong Kong

Today, my girlfriend was giving me amazing head. I was really getting into it, when she looked up, and gave me a thumbs up. I can never take oral sex seriously again. FML

#6069368 (121)

I agree, your life sucks (6210) - you deserved it (10893)

On 10/30/2009 at 12:34pm - intimacy - by man (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found out that if you let your son install a new shower head, he won't tighten it properly. So when you turn the shower on, it will shoot out at rocket speed, hitting you in the face. Then when you grab the shower handle to prevent yourself falling backwards, you will just rip that out and hit your head again. FML

#5858229 (100)

I agree, your life sucks (23685) - you deserved it (3255)

On 10/16/2009 at 10:38pm - misc - by Ndanick1193 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

#5828114 (225)

I agree, your life sucks (66551) - you deserved it (9418)

On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I made a tuna sandwich. It was really nice , so I looked at the label to see what brand it was. Turns out it wasn't tuna. It was fancy cat food. FML

#5636942 (146)

I agree, your life sucks (8467) - you deserved it (28620)

On 10/04/2009 at 3:50am - animals - by Rizzle (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I was woken up from a nap by my cat attacking my face. Evidently, my husband thought it would be funny to shine a laser pointer on my cheek. FML

#5608454 (65)

I agree, your life sucks (24561) - you deserved it (2013)

On 10/02/2009 at 6:23pm - love - by Zamaria - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend beat me at ping pong, twenty to three. She said I let her win because I don't respect her, then stormed out of the room. I'm just really bad at ping pong. FML

#5423695 (75)

I agree, your life sucks (30254) - you deserved it (2840)

On 09/23/2009 at 4:14am - love - by garrett (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she suddenly stopped and yelled "STOP!". I stopped, scared I'd hurt her. She then yelled "HAMMER TIME!" and started to dance. We never finished. FML

#5286193 (192)

I agree, your life sucks (19314) - you deserved it (3441)

On 09/16/2009 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was hanging out with my best friend. I have been getting these random explicit texts and phone calls so I just joking said to my friend, "I think someone wrote my number on a bathroom stall." At which point he said, "Sorry, I didn't think people really called those numbers." FML

#5227356 (104)

I agree, your life sucks (30755) - you deserved it (2153)

On 09/13/2009 at 11:57am - misc - by Casden (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was fooling around with my boyfriend in his room. He grabbed me behind the head to pull me in for a hard, romantic kiss. He accidentally smashed my nose into his cheekbone, and my nose started gushing blood and continued to bleed for over 2 hours. It's broken, and he just laughed. FML

#5219756 (61)

I agree, your life sucks (30399) - you deserved it (2776)

On 09/13/2009 at 12:26am - love - by broken (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had a long, meaningful telephone conversation. After hanging up, I realized I hadn't had such a great conversation in a long time. Who was it with? The Dell Customer Support guy. FML

#5081613 (80)

I agree, your life sucks (26190) - you deserved it (3685)

On 09/06/2009 at 1:27pm - misc - by asdfjkl (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I went out with my family and boyfriend for dinner. We were all having a good time, and suddenly at the end of dinner he decides to kneel down on one knee, take out an engagement ring, and say "I choose you, Pikachu," with a straight face. He was serious. FML

#5049999 (590)

I agree, your life sucks (84484) - you deserved it (17446)

On 09/04/2009 at 10:19pm - love - by mandy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was awakened by the sound of chain-saws. Moments later a tree branch came through my roof. FML

#5040554 (66)

I agree, your life sucks (34793) - you deserved it (1206)

On 09/04/2009 at 12:46pm - misc - by 1ndustrytx (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I thought it would be sexy to surprise my boyfriend by hiding in the closet naked and pouncing on him as he came to get his pants. I never got to the pouncing. Apparently my boyfriend has heightened reflexes so instead I got slapped hard across the face. My ear is still ringing. FML

#4995103 (200)

I agree, your life sucks (10386) - you deserved it (30195)

On 09/02/2009 at 7:19am - intimacy - by keepsmiling - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)