Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

laurabev

Offline (the 11/10/2014 at 1:39am) | Search for a member

laurabev

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 22 September 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1124
  • Number of comments : 96
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About laurabev : What the hell are you looking here for?
Go do something productive with your life. ;)

laurabev's page activity

Visits<b>iris2288fml</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 12:17pm<b>Mahenoor</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 3:48pm<b>NEMESIS15</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 2:02pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 6:35pm<b>killakiwi</b> - the 04/07/2011 at 4:52pm<b>Snaek</b> - the 03/25/2011 at 7:41am

Liked!<b>iris2288fml</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 6:17pm

laurabev's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of laurabev's badges

laurabev's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to pick my parents up from the hospital and drive them back home, after they were treated for eating large amounts of cheese that my dad claimed to have "aged" for several years. FML

#20116789
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17396) - you deserved it (1260)

On 10/14/2012 at 4:36pm - health - by oppafucktardstyle (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. Right as she orgasmed, she screamed out Megatron's name. When I later confronted her about this, she said that she always had a crush on him and wanted to be queen of the Decepticons. I've been dating this lunatic for a year and half now. FML

#20056354
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18040) - you deserved it (23362)

On 09/03/2012 at 9:02pm - intimacy - by Loserbot (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had an upset stomach. I lay down in bed with a bucket nearby just in case. Later on, the urge to vomit overcame me, and I puked into the bucket. I realised too late that my cat had chosen to sleep in it. He jumped out and spread vomit all over my apartment. FML

#18716901
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37314) - you deserved it (4933) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/05/2012 at 3:40pm - animals - by Fat_abott - France

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

#16860650
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38845) - you deserved it (15616)

On 06/26/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, my dad came to visit me. By visit I mean he arrived, took a huge smelly dump and left. This is the first time I've seen my dad in months. FML

#16466098
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30660) - you deserved it (2673)

On 06/02/2011 at 10:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I had my new girlfriend over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, my dad started poking her with his fork. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he barked back, "Just making sure she isn't a blow-up doll!" FML

#16271302
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39783) - you deserved it (4116)

On 05/20/2011 at 7:30pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend kindly let me know that she didn't care that I am 'below average' in the penis department because it will leave her nice and tight for her next boyfriend. FML

#15948281
341 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65481) - you deserved it (7377)

On 04/27/2011 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I got a letter back from the family I will be staying with as a part of an exchange program. Apparently they own a slaughterhouse type farm, and I'm expected to kill one of their animals and eat it as a gift from the family. I'm a vegan. FML

#15927164
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36550) - you deserved it (17442)

On 04/25/2011 at 10:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my roommate told me there is some restricted number that keeps calling and waking her up at odd hours of the night. She then says she's getting the police involved to find out who it is because she feels "harassed". I'm the restricted caller calling to wake her up from snoring so loud. FML

#15779610
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14988) - you deserved it (28346)

On 04/14/2011 at 12:37am - misc - by wowimscrewed (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, feeling social, I went to a bar. During a trip to the dimly lit restroom, I fixed my makeup, and carefully penciling my sparse eyebrows. After an evening of meeting new people, I went home. In my well-lighted restroom, I discovered that my eyebrow pencil was actually my bright red lip liner. FML

#15705121
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17899) - you deserved it (30245)

On 04/09/2011 at 3:52am - misc - by 2classicNot2 (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, at 21 years old, I am still so flat chested that I can't even fit into training bras meant for 12 year olds. FML

#15679727
588 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49647) - you deserved it (5275)

On 04/07/2011 at 12:55pm - misc - by nerdsgetmehot (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I finally learned why the application of lasers, acids, liquid nitrogen and witchcraft never did any good on the huge warts on my hands. Apparently, it's a genetic disease and not a virus. For unknown reasons, I've recently grown the normal viral kind too. On my tongue. FML

Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML

#15598918
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33470) - you deserved it (45134)

On 04/02/2011 at 1:03am - misc - by Toothy (man) - United States (California)

Today, while at the mall I opened a bathroom stall thinking nobody was in there. The door just didn't close properly. I hit an elderly woman in the head. FML

#15464639
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21710) - you deserved it (9426)

On 03/24/2011 at 10:46am - misc - by FckMyLife (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

#14968643
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46810) - you deserved it (9272)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: