kwinters

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kwinters

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 26 June 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3443
  • Number of comments : 51
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About kwinters : I read FMLs for a 'lol' every now and then and to make myself feel better. That and a part of me loves to argue with dumbasses who think they're God's gift to the world when they comment, which is why I made this account. :)

kwinters's page activity

Visits<b>One_Way</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 12:27pm<b>needagoodlaugh</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 9:19pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 1:55am<b>jonjonguapito</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 9:47am<b>GotItWow</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 7:19am<b>ericmtz</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 12:24am<b>Capriccio22</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 7:58am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 1:40pm<b>horseychickidee</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 2:18pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:18pm<b>marinaim</b> - the 04/24/2011 at 9:37am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 4:32am<b>illmatic2</b> - the 07/01/2010 at 10:26pm<b>meavey</b> - the 06/17/2010 at 9:29am<b>hannah30</b> - the 05/02/2010 at 9:13am<b>ILIEKGIRLS</b> - the 05/02/2010 at 9:00am<b>HarperGirl</b> - the 01/20/2010 at 9:48am<b>JukeboxBunny</b> - the 01/08/2010 at 9:58pm

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kwinters's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend humped me to the tune of the Imperial March from Star Wars. FML

by ChubbyTubby / 01/17/2010 at 1:13pm / United States (Georgia) / Geek

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML

by scubai / 01/14/2010 at 3:36pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that last summer while my girlfriend worked on a Disney Cruise ship, she cheated on me with Tarzan. FML

by daragnan / 01/10/2010 at 4:47pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend told me he likes having sex during my period because it makes him feel like he stabbed a small animal to death. FML

by Michelle / 12/27/2009 at 2:13am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend gave me my first compliment in months. Apparently my body spray makes me smell like a stripper. He then asked me if he could "park the beef bus in tuna town". FML

by Laura_2118 / 12/12/2009 at 2:28am / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, I went to the movies. Not only did the movie end up being awful, but I came to my car to find out someone drew Squidward from "SpongeBob" with large letters spelling "I LIKE POTATOES!" on my windshield. In permanent marker. FML

by squidwardpotatoes / 11/14/2009 at 6:08am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I was carrying several bags of groceries up the stairs to my 3rd story apartment when I saw a giant rat climbing down the wall towards me. I screamed and dropped my groceries, which went over the rail and landed on the bottom floor, destroying them all. The rat? Just a big leaf. FML

by n_london / 10/12/2009 at 4:19pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a blind date. We had agreed on meeting in front of a park. Thinking I was there first, I texted her "I'm already there, sitting next to the fat chick." I heard a beep. SHE was the "fat chick." FML

by sarahh38 / 09/16/2009 at 2:23pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I was at the store buying some feminine products. At the cash register, the clerk said to me "Dude, you know those are for girls right?" I am a 30 year old woman. FML

by secretdeo / 08/24/2009 at 12:48am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I posted a status update on Facebook about how much I liked the Season Finale of NBC's "Heroes". My hand slipped to the right and it came out as "I really love Herpes. It's much better than everyone says it is". I didn't notice for few hours. FML

by NotThatKind / 08/24/2009 at 12:28am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend updated her Facebook status when I was with her. No, let me correct myself. Today, my girlfriend updated her Facebook status when I was in her. FML

by Anonymous / 08/16/2009 at 2:53pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bear to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

by catlady1989 / 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

by Dunzo15 / 05/02/2009 at 2:28am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2009 at 4:18pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

by offbeans / 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (California) / Kids