klm2purple

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Offline (the 03/04/2016 at 4:09am)

klm2purple

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5498
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About klm2purple : Well this is me... I'm alive. Message me if you want. Yup :)

klm2purple's page activity

Visits<b>Dexter83</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 3:26am<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 1:31am<b>BlackFames</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 12:35am<b>Nahpets</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 4:35am<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 12:49pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 3:41pm<b>john_ron</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 2:45am<b>ealovan</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 5:07am<b>p36288</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 7:25am<b>xxred209xx</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 12:48pm<b>De4dbite</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 8:58am<b>thecman25</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 5:47pm<b>forlifebro</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 6:56pm<b>laaryssa</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 11:24pm<b>bigjenny19735</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 11:18am<b>lord_meloetta</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 9:17pm<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 12:53am<b>Taylor22294</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 2:09am

Fucked!<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 6:49pm<b>ealovan</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 8:41am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 2:34am<b>dylanger16</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 11:01pm

klm2purple's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of klm2purple's badges

klm2purple's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in church. During the prayer, I moved my foot and it pressed against the automatic button on my umbrella causing it to suddenly open. As if that wasn't bad enough, I screamed simultaneously at the shock. FML

by embarrassed / 01/04/2016 at 12:58pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I locked our keys in the car. Our only spare is in the drawer with all our sex toys. So we either had to get our oldest go in the drawer and get them to bring to us or walk the 12 miles home. My feet will never recover from that walk. FML

by Anonymous / 08/24/2015 at 12:25am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

by Anonymous / 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, the guy I've been dating for 3 weeks showed up at my house at 7 AM. I was about to give him a kiss when he said, "Good morning, is Sarah here?" I was confused until I realized he didn't recognize me because I had no make up on. FML

by sarahxHx / 07/14/2015 at 2:42am / United States (California) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had decided that I was ready to have sex with my boyfriend. So, I called him and told him how naughty I felt, only to realize that I had called my dad. FML

by EternalBlossom / 07/14/2015 at 1:03am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I once again asked my girlfriend about getting married, as she had previously said she would only get married once gay marriage was legal. She still said no. FML

by Fgjvshnb / 07/05/2015 at 11:54pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was using the toilet. I was still insanely pissed off over an argument with my girlfriend, which kind of explains why I was wiping my ass so furiously that my fingers broke through the tissue and ended up in my ass, causing me to shriek like a little girl. FML

by Anonymous / 06/19/2015 at 9:22pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, in the middle of a boring class, my friend offered me some Smarties. We're not allowed to eat in class, but I had a couple anyway. As I put them in my mouth, my "friend" stood up and yelled that I was doing ecstasy. I might actually get expelled. FML

by drugsforthugs / 11/18/2014 at 12:26pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML

by notsofriendly / 11/06/2014 at 3:15pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I lost my laptop, but I have my old childhood computer to use. It's password-protected, and the hint to the password is "meaner than Hera." I haven't been into Greek mythology since I was a kid, and if anything, this computer has just shown me how dumb I've gotten over the years. FML

by HeckIfIKnow / 10/21/2014 at 11:36pm / United States (California) / Geek

Today, my parents told me off for reading, as opposed to watching TV like the rest of the family, because it was "anti-social". FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2014 at 11:37am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, my psycho mom walked in while I was chilling and having fun with some friends. She kicked them out and now wants to drug test me, because "Nobody's that happy without drugs". FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2014 at 2:33pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I attended an assembly regarding senior graduation. The assistant principal told us to look to the left and right of us, because those people would be our friends for the rest of our lives. I was the only one in the entire row. FML

by allergic_to_bull / 10/08/2014 at 2:48pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

by Operation Yewtree here I come / 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have such severe ADD that I can't focus without my medication. When I take the medication, I can only focus on one thing, but not necessarily the thing I need to be focusing on. I have a chem test soon, and I've been vacuuming my room for the past 4 hours. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2014 at 3:32pm / United States (Texas) / Health