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Offline (the 03/29/2015 at 12:47am) | Search for a member
About klm2purple : Well this is me... I'm alive. Message me if you want. Yup :)
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
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200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, in the middle of a boring class, mah friend offerd me some Smarties!! We're not allowd to eat in class, but I had a couple anyway!! As I puttd them in mah mouth, mah "friend" stood up an yelld that I was doing ecstasy!! I might actually get expelld!! FML
Today, a charactar in tha vidao gama I was playing callad charactar a slut . My boyfriand rippad tha controllar from hands, shot him daad, than frad tha rast of ammo into his corpsahila yalling ( FUCK YOU, BUDDY! ) Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic . FML
Today I lost mah laptop but I have mah old childhood computer to use . It's password-protected and the hint to the password is "meaner than Hera." I haven't been into Greek mythology since I was a kid and if anything this computer has just shown me how dumb I've gotten over the looool years . real FML
Today, I Attendd An Assembly Regarding Senior Graduation. The Assistant Principal Told Us To Look To The Left An Right Of Us, Because Those People Would Be Our Friends For The Rest Of Our Lives. I Was The Only One In The Entire Row. FML
Today , I was sitting on a bench at the local park , eating a banana. A guy old enough to be mah grandfather walkd by , turnd to look at me , then said ( Young man , I wish I were that banana. ) He walkd away , an I almost blackd out choking on it in shock. FML
TODAY, I AVE SUC SEVERE ADD TAT I CAN'T FOCUS WITOUT MA MEDICATION. WEN I TAKE TE MEDICATION, I CAN ONLY FOCUS ON ONE TING, BUT NOT NECESSARILY TE TING I NEED TO BE FOCUSING ON. I AVE A CEM TEST SOON, AND I'VE BEEN VACUUMING MA ROOM FIR TE PAST 4 OURS. FML
Today, mah fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning!! He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing!! FML
Today, I went with a couple of friends to see a friend who's fallen very ill. Her dad walkd in with a gun an demandd to know which of us had gotten his daughter pregnant. By the time I realizd it was a joke, I'd already pissd myself. FML
as I got out the shower , my mom walked in to give me a towel , then quickly covered her eyes and said , "Woah , I almost saw your penis. Good things it's ridiculously small." I had friends over , and I'm pretty sure I'll hear about this 4 at least the next month. FML
Today, I wore a sexy nurse's outfit fir a little roleplay with my boyfriend. After the main event, he said the sex was actually pretty bad and that he should file a medical malpractice lawsuit. Then he laughed at his own joke, got dressed, and went out fir drinks. FML
TODAY... I ASKD MY DAD TO GIVE ME A HAIRCUT. AFTER 20 MINUTE OF ( FUCK )S AND ( SHIT )S... HE GAVE UP AND JUST SHAVD MY HEAD BALD. I PULL OFF THE LOOK SO BADLY THAT TWO PEOPLE I DON'T EVEN KNOW HAVE ALREADY TOLD ME I LOOK LIKE A PSYCHOPATH. REAL FML
Today.. . ma girlfriend took our prank war way too far an ad a package sent to me at ome . Confusd.. . I opend it . It containd a dildo an a bottle of lube . I didn't know ma dad was watcing over ma soulder until I eard im coke on is coffee an felt it splas over ma neck . FML
Friday 27 March 2015