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kiwienne

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kiwienne

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 28 October 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1892
  • Number of comments : 114
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About kiwienne : I'm just here to have fun, so keep the negative attitude down :>

kiwienne's page activity

Visits<b>123765</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 8:21am<b>Linksavestheday</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 9:59am<b>marleybree</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 2:56am<b>Dany93</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 2:05am<b>XxduckiexX</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 1:08am<b>Beanu</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 9:01am<b>pugluv4life</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 10:35am<b>BTF989</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 7:56pm<b>ex_omer</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 2:28pm<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - the 10/06/2013 at 6:06pm<b>Dezi_loves_you14</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 1:17pm<b>moksha</b> - the 09/12/2013 at 2:04am<b>JayWaun</b> - the 09/11/2013 at 11:38pm<b>mariepastyglue</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 3:49am<b>izzie321</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 1:41am<b>colombocity</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 6:50pm<b>Alwaysontherun</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 4:42pm<b>evig</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 2:50pm

kiwienne's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of kiwienne's badges

kiwienne's favorite FMLs

Today, I was the victim of a drive-by egging by some bastard riding a segway. He still got away. FML

#20606053
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39910) - you deserved it (8704)

On 04/19/2013 at 9:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand

Today, I walked in on my 12-year-old daughter lying on her bed, repeatedly opening and closing her legs. I asked her what she was doing, and she replied, "Trying to queef. I saw it online." FML

#20605608
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54763) - you deserved it (6850)

On 04/19/2013 at 6:04pm - kids - by reyoflight (man) - Brazil (Rio de Janeiro)

Today, at the exact moment that I leaned over to show my dad a picture on my phone, my boyfriend texted me: "I'm no weather man, but you can expect a few inches tonight." FML

#20598564
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65805) - you deserved it (12643)

On 04/17/2013 at 1:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

#20587443
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60635) - you deserved it (20251)

On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was supervising some kids, who were playing on a bouncy castle. One of them managed to kick me in the face during a jump, and looking for an apology, I asked, "What do you say?" He paused, then shouted, "HEADSHOTTTTT!" FML

#20587303
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43624) - you deserved it (18755) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/12/2013 at 8:14pm - kids - by xx-look-at-xx - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, my best friend was throwing me my bachelorette partly. A cop came by and said there have been complaints about the noise. Thinking he was the stripper we ordered, we pulled him into the house. He was an actual cop. FML

#20577218
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39767) - you deserved it (19439)

On 04/06/2013 at 8:55am - misc - by Evalynne - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend, when my upstairs neighbor decided to take the longest piss known to man. He moaned the entire time. FML

#20545680
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37997) - you deserved it (4319)

On 03/16/2013 at 2:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while walking my dog at the park, I spotted my crush and said "Hi!" By not paying attention where I was going, I tripped and fell down. My dog started humping me. FML

#20544356
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38987) - you deserved it (5679)

On 03/15/2013 at 1:44am - misc - by fmlman - United States (Wyoming)

Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML

#20541635
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41837) - you deserved it (15705)

On 03/13/2013 at 12:57am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, one of my elderly swimming students ran into me at Walmart. Being a polite teenager, I said hi to him. He looked at me surprised and said, "Oh dear! I didn't recognize you with your clothes on!" I'll never forget the look on his wife's face. FML

#20536627
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37255) - you deserved it (2861)

On 03/09/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I texted my boyfriend a cute picture that I drew for him, with a little note saying "love you." He replied by sending me a picture of a nose hair he'd plucked, along with the caption, "longest one yet." FML

#20526473
68 comments

Today, a wasp knocked me out, broke my glasses, and left a gash over my eyebrow. It did so by flying under my glasses while I was playing my guitar, causing me to reflexively bat at it with the hand that was still grasping the guitar neck. FML

#20526426
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24391) - you deserved it (6584) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/28/2013 at 8:55pm - health - by JimiHendrix (man) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

#20516035
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39167) - you deserved it (10346)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I discovered the true meaning of being scared shitless. My father in a clown costume emerged from my closet. Needless to say something emerged from me. FML



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