Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

kingbrizo

Search for a member

kingbrizo
  • Town/Country : So Cal, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 14 December 1996 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 253
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About kingbrizo : I live in So Cal, I love snowboarding, and I have blonde hair and green eyes.
I like to play soccer, softball and football with my friends, and I especially love my music! I love most every classic rock artist like, Bon Jovi, Van Halen, AC/DC, Guns N' Roses, Aerosmith, and Lynyrd Skynyrd! Just to name a few...there's plenty more!
I have a great sense of humour, and my first language is sarcasm! I know some Portuguese, French, and Turkish, and Im learning Spanish now!
I don't like much foods, but Im always willing to try! A favourite is chocolate, but who's isnt?!
I suppose thats all for now, but if anyone sees me, please let me know, because I havent seen myself since this morning!

kingbrizo's last visitors

pillowcasesdead_insects21newzealandninaskyezcmac86NickaPLZMF__IINot_Creativeenchicco

kingbrizo's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Tweet, tweet

You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we can understand why.

See all of kingbrizo's badges

kingbrizo's favorite FMLs

Today, the arts company I work for cancelled our 8 pm sold-out outdoor performance at 7:30 due to rain, and will have to reticket 550 patrons. I'm the only person in the office trained in ticketing. It stopped raining 10 minutes after we cancelled it. FML

#20517422
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23523) - you deserved it (1641)

On 02/22/2013 at 10:48am - work - by Wilf (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I emailed 10 parents inviting them to my son's birthday party. All 10 emailed back saying their kids had to get a cavity filled. FML

#20517380
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26201) - you deserved it (2173)

On 02/22/2013 at 9:51am - kids - by Paris101 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I downloaded a movie that I already own on DVD, because I was feeling too lazy to get up and fetch it from the living room. I think I've hit rock bottom. FML

#20516729
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8116) - you deserved it (32807) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/21/2013 at 7:16pm - misc - by lolo - Israel (HaDarom)

Today, I discovered that when you suddenly get channels that you didn't have before, it doesn't mean there was a glitch and you're getting free TV, it just means that your son called the cable company and had your plan changed so you get every conceivable channel at a hugely increased price. FML

#20515174
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25739) - you deserved it (3244)

On 02/20/2013 at 5:55pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got my results on a recent, important midterm. During the exam, I'd noticed my instructor had accidentally left an answers page in the test packet, so being honest, I didn't look at them. It turns out she did it on purpose to help us pass. I failed. FML

#20515105
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27612) - you deserved it (9719)

On 02/20/2013 at 4:52pm - misc - by its ok to cheat!? - United States (California)

Today, the people living below me have been blasting their music so loudly that I can hear every word as clear as day. The people next door think it's my music and feel the need to bang on the wall and blast their music just as loudly in revenge. I have two very important exams tomorrow. FML

#20515010
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28457) - you deserved it (1984)

On 02/20/2013 at 3:40pm - misc - by Ughh! - France

Today, I got locked out of my car for an hour in frigid weather at a busy gas station. Every time I tried to use the key, the alarm went off and the locks wouldn't work. The car company claims they've never heard of this happening. I just bought it last week after taking out a 5 year loan. FML

#20513495
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21074) - you deserved it (1496)

On 02/19/2013 at 1:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a woman strapped her 8-year-old son into the seat next to me on a transatlantic flight. Thinking they'd been unable to book seats together, I offered to swap seats with her. She said she'd booked it this way intentionally, because he's a "fucking brat" on flights. She was right. FML

#20513411
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36015) - you deserved it (1543)

On 02/19/2013 at 12:13pm - kids - by Sigh (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, it's my first day at a new school. I transferred here halfway through the year to get away from a girl who bullies me. She's apparently bullied her mom into transferring her here as well. FML

#20513405
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34345) - you deserved it (1804)

On 02/19/2013 at 12:05pm - misc - by SchoolSucks (woman) - United States

Today, I walked into my dad straightening my dog's fur. His excuse? The dog needed to feel pretty. FML

#20513110
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23686) - you deserved it (3418)

On 02/19/2013 at 2:01am - animals - by xtammyle - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I purchased a box of girl scout cookies from a coworker. I wanted to save them for later at home, so I placed them on my desk and then headed to a meeting. When I returned, there was an empty box sitting there with a post-it note saying, "Thanks!" Nobody will own up to it. FML

#20512675
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20244) - you deserved it (4057)

On 02/18/2013 at 8:49pm - work - by erockinthesuburb (man) - United States

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML

#20512577
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30017) - you deserved it (1845)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML

#20512577
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30017) - you deserved it (1845)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I started at my new job. The woman who I'll be working right next to 40 hours a week introduced herself with, "I know what your name is. I know what you're planning, and I've been sent to destroy you." FML

#20512419
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25437) - you deserved it (2279)

On 02/18/2013 at 5:15pm - work - by ari (woman) - United States

Today, I went in to get my first tattoo. I'd put a lot of thought into it and was really excited when the day came. Long story short, the Celtic knot I'd gotten turned out to have an alternate meaning of "female sex slave." The faces my very Irish family made were beyond words. FML

#20511821
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11283) - you deserved it (29773)

On 02/18/2013 at 3:50am - intimacy - by UnluckyInk (woman) - United States (New York)



Orinocou's illustrated FML

Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Worst Moms Ever
  • We could be lazy and start off with a "your momma" joke, but your mom is so nice that she'd probably bake us a cake and pat us on the head, and those jokes are crap anyway. Because most moms are nice. We…

Sunday 12 May 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: