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kingbrizo

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kingbrizo
  • Town/Country : So Cal, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 13 December 1996 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 1569
  • Number of comments : 66
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About kingbrizo : I live in So Cal, I love snowboarding, and I have blonde hair and green eyes.
I like to play soccer, softball and football with my friends, and I especially love my music. I love most every classic rock artist like, Bon Jovi, Van Halen, AC/DC, Guns N' Roses, Aerosmith, and Lynyrd Skynyrd. Just to name a few...there's plenty more.
I have a great sense of humour, and my first language is sarcasm. I know some Portuguese, French, and Turkish, and Im learning Spanish now!
I don't like much foods, but Im always willing to try. A favourite is chocolate, but who's isnt?!
If you have any questions, feel free to ask, and I'll gladly answer them =)

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kingbrizo's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up from a drunken one-night-stand. The person I slept with turned out to be heavily pregnant. She tried to convince me that I am the father and that I passed out for 7 months. FML

Today, my friends started calling me "Soberman" because I recently gave up alcohol and have a Doberman. Normally, I wouldn't mind the nickname, but they call me Soberman everywhere. My new boss now thinks it's because I AM an alcoholic. FML

#20964266
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35557) - you deserved it (2476)

On 11/20/2013 at 6:09am - misc - by juice723 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was cussed out by a customer who was unhappy, and he asked to speak with my manager. When I told him I owned the store, he said that that was the problem. Apparently women are "too flaky" to run a bakery properly. FML

#20964215
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39757) - you deserved it (2555)

On 11/20/2013 at 2:59am - work - by bakingwomannnnnnnn (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my cat has figured out that while I'm good at sleeping through her nagging in the early morning hours, I will unfailingly wake up for my baby. FML

Today, I'm moving from Arizona to Washington State with my 2 cats in my car. I've only just left and just learned that one cat gets carsick and the other stress farts. Only 956 more miles to go. FML

#20962468
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39253) - you deserved it (5106)

On 11/18/2013 at 6:47pm - animals - by Catcrap! - United States (California)

Today, I donated blood. Afterwards, I regained consciousness on the floor with a half-eaten cookie in my mouth. FML

Today, I superglued the sole back into my shoe. Unfortunately, the glue didn't dry as quickly as it said it would on the bottle. The glue seeped through the sole and my foot got superglued to my shoe. FML

#20956277
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37012) - you deserved it (10141)

On 11/13/2013 at 12:51pm - misc - by footstuck - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I realized how amazing I've become at faking orgasms: I made up everything from the noises of my juices to pure, blissful climax over the phone to my husband. He came; I finished putting laundry away. FML

#20955991
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42876) - you deserved it (11198)

On 11/13/2013 at 1:40am - intimacy - by CanWeAllGetOne - United States (Texas)

Today, working as a cashier, I had a customer come through and ask to purchase a bag of ice. I asked, "Eight pound or twenty pound?", referring to the clearly marked weight of the bags. He replied, "What's the difference?" FML

#20955463
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32759) - you deserved it (2675)

On 11/12/2013 at 6:56pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend's ex moved into the apartment beneath us. She's already called the cops on us for a noise complaint twice. We were sleeping. It's going to be a long year. FML

#20955154
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40218) - you deserved it (2221)

On 11/12/2013 at 2:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, my sister introduced our parents to her new boyfriend. He's my boyfriend, and he told me he was going to be out of state for a few weeks on business. FML

Today, I got a concussion. It was when an entire shelf of bicycle helmets tumbled onto my skull. FML

#20954433
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35898) - you deserved it (2604)

On 11/11/2013 at 9:14pm - health - by myheadhurts (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my wife and I were watching Killing Kennedy. Jokingly, I said, "Spoiler alert: he dies." She threw a book at me and won't talk to me. I think she's serious. FML

#20953867
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42794) - you deserved it (6290)

On 11/11/2013 at 12:20pm - misc - by Thomas - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was at a party with a few of my friends. We saw a guy walking around with bright pink lipstick all over his mouth, so we made a bet to see who could match the lipstick to the girl first. I won. It was my girlfriend's. FML

#20953788
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52089) - you deserved it (3465)

On 11/11/2013 at 10:55am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was mentioning to a coworker how there was a huge lull today in business. A young coworker then turns to me and says in a snooty tone, "I think you mean a 'lol', it's pronounced L-O-L." FML

#20953649
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40358) - you deserved it (2393)

On 11/11/2013 at 5:36am - work - by shut up. - New Zealand



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