About kingbrizo : I live in So Cal, I love snowboarding, and I have blonde hair and green eyes.
I like to play soccer, softball and football with my friends, and I especially love my music! I love most every classic rock artist like, Bon Jovi, Van Halen, AC/DC, Guns N' Roses, Aerosmith, and Lynyrd Skynyrd! Just to name a few...there's plenty more!
I have a great sense of humour, and my first language is sarcasm! I know some Portuguese, French, and Turkish, and Im learning Spanish now!
I don't like much foods, but Im always willing to try! A favourite is chocolate, but who's isnt?!
I suppose thats all for now, but if anyone sees me, please let me know, because I havent seen myself since this morning!
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Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45555) - you deserved it (3693)
On 05/05/2013 at 12:14am - work - by ADickySituation - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML
I agree, your life sucks (44157) - you deserved it (6078)
On 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm - misc - by emasculated 10000% (man) - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)
Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML
I agree, your life sucks (57912) - you deserved it (8184)
On 05/04/2013 at 8:51am - kids - by wtfmama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my boyfriend and I stressed out preparing for our one week holiday. We packed for the whole day, said goodbye to everyone and arrived at the airport quite exhausted after a 45-minute train ride. Turns out our flight isn't until tomorrow. The check-in lady couldn't stop laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35377) - you deserved it (13179)
On 05/04/2013 at 6:24am - misc - by Tickettoride (woman) - Austria (Wien)
Today, I was taking a dump in the bathroom. The lights turned off and I was too embarrassed to come out of the stall. The janitor walked in, turned the lights on and asked If anyone was there. I stayed quiet. He turned the lights back off and locked me in the bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15294) - you deserved it (51766)
Today, a family of geese nested outside my halls of residence. They have started attacking everyone who tries to get in or out of the building. I'm basically being placed under house arrest by birds. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36862) - you deserved it (2867)
On 04/29/2013 at 12:14pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (York)
Today, I had a big party planned. All but one of the guests cancelled. See you at 7, mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40470) - you deserved it (2944)
On 04/29/2013 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - Netherlands
Today, I wanted revenge on my college's drinks machine. For the past two days, it forgot to release a cup before pouring my coffee. This time, I had planned ahead; I put my money in, entered the code, and quickly inserted my own cup. It gave me hot water. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39172) - you deserved it (4474) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, for the third time this week, a telemarketer called me. Seriously annoyed, I told him in German that I don't speak English, in an attempt to get rid of him. He then started delivering his product pitch in German. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45534) - you deserved it (9789)
On 04/28/2013 at 9:57am - misc - by Anonymous - China (Shanghai)
Today, I was coming home from a much-needed vacation. The time I spent on the plane consisted of kids screaming and throwing tantrums. One of them managed to give me a black eye with a shoe. Their mom pretended to be asleep so I'd have to deal with her kids for her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35756) - you deserved it (2094)
On 04/27/2013 at 10:30pm - health - by Satan'sChildren - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, at work, I was screamed at and slapped by a woman for supposedly violating her 2nd Amendment rights. In reality, I'd simply turned her away from the 10 items or less line because she had well over the allowed number of items. I've no fucking idea what's wrong with some people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40380) - you deserved it (2461)
On 04/26/2013 at 6:03pm - work - by fuck you walmart (woman) - United States
Today, I was driving and a cute guy was staring at me. Flattered, I smiled at him, but he didn't even react. I realized he wasn't admiring me he was admiring my truck. This is the 5th time this week. My truck gets more game than I do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40744) - you deserved it (6323)
On 04/26/2013 at 10:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, while he was eating chicken, one of my friends asked me why I'm a vegetarian. I responded that I believe in animal rights and don't like the conditions the animals are forced to live in. He looked at me incredulously before explaining that "chickens aren't animals, they're birds." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34715) - you deserved it (7352)
On 04/26/2013 at 9:23am - animals - by revan546 - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend in public. She happily said yes, and the surrounding crowd cheered for us. About 10 minutes later, after the excitement died down, she leaned over and quietly said, "Actually, I don't want to marry you. I only said yes so I wouldn't disappoint the crowd." FML
I agree, your life sucks (65078) - you deserved it (8402)
On 04/26/2013 at 5:17am - love - by Anonymous -
Today, it was my wedding day. My new husband and I, for a laugh, did our first dance to LMFAO's "I'm sexy and I know it" with stupid moves and everything. 200 guests. Nobody laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42159) - you deserved it (23015)
On 04/24/2013 at 6:29pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)
Monday 20 May 2013
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