jokesta187

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jokesta187

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 596
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About jokesta187 : I'm 23. Male. Favorite quote, "The joke is in your hands."
Peter Griffin is my hero.
On phone.. So yeah.

jokesta187's page activity

Visits<b>Raleaf</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 6:41pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 10:12pm<b>shabadabba</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 7:37pm<b>panromantic</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 8:46pm<b>Lacalema</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 11:59pm<b>dandee_one</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 8:04pm<b>max367</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 3:25pm<b>singer0421</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 8:11am<b>Thatdesichick1</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 7:24am<b>oxythemoron</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 11:59am<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 8:30pm<b>Googolman</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 2:23pm<b>Much2Much4U</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 6:39pm<b>myoukei</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 12:42am<b>swick25</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 1:07pm<b>Sundevil99</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 11:01am<b>scorchnight</b> - the 12/21/2013 at 11:52pm<b>movman8</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 6:05am

jokesta187's FML badges

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of jokesta187's badges

jokesta187's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked into the room naked while my wife was on the computer to surprise her. She smiled, put down her laptop and left for the bathroom so I started jerking it in anticipation. It was really feeling good until my wife's best friend, who was on Skype, started giggling. FML

by fredo / 03/19/2013 at 8:31am / United States (Iowa) / Intimacy

Today, I was stuck in the bathroom yelling for someone to get me toilet paper. My grandpa slips a small leaf under the door and says, "This is what I used in my day." FML

by Obi1Shinobi / 10/30/2012 at 10:27am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at work as an EMT, I was telling a panicked patient that I would be taking her vital signs. I inadvertently said that I would be taking her vital organs. FML

by Medic / 10/28/2012 at 11:10pm / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, I got lost at Best Buy. Meanwhile, my mom freaked out, and they called out my name over the intercom. When I walked up to the desk and they saw I was 17, the employees burst out laughing. FML

by Anna / 10/02/2012 at 1:37pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a walk when I noticed an elderly man on the ground, unmoving. Being a registered nurse, I tried to give him CPR. As my lips touched his, he hacked a loogie and spat it into the back of my throat. I swallowed. FML

by guy / 07/29/2012 at 11:24pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML

by mrricecakes / 03/23/2012 at 1:55am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, someone started an event on Facebook for tomorrow called Kick A Ginger Day. Over 300 people are attending. There are only two redheads in my school, and I'm one of them. FML

by Someone / 02/22/2011 at 1:30pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. We are both virgins. After we kissed and I took down my pants, she screamed and said "That THING is going to break me." We never did it. FML

by Anonymous / 01/16/2011 at 8:28pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on. My boyfriend noticed that every time I'm about to climax, I hit my head on something. Whether it's a wall or his face. FML

by Anonymous / 01/06/2011 at 1:03am / United States / Intimacy

Today, the elevator got stuck in between floor 4 and 5 at my doctors office. I had been having violent diarrhea. It was the reason I was at the doctor. Elevator was stuck for 35 minutes. During that time, I diarrhea'd in my pants twice. There were seven other people in the elevator. FML

by Christopher / 12/13/2010 at 4:16am / Canada (Alberta) / Health

Today, I finally got intimate with my girlfriend, the girl of my dreams. I undressed and, ready to step in bed with her, I see her staring at 'it'. Which was quickly followed by laughter. FML

by Geez / 10/19/2009 at 1:02pm / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Intimacy