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johnnyk3's favorite FMLs
by Guntherdog / 06/27/2013 at 11:17am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/17/2013 at 3:56pm / United States / Intimacy
by life insurance for 1 / 05/30/2013 at 12:29pm / United States (California) / Kids
by Anonymous / 05/06/2013 at 2:13pm / Ireland (Donegal) / Love
by Anonymous / 03/16/2013 at 2:19am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I asked my boyfriend to give me a back rub. He claimed that he had a sore hand, so I retorted, "You have two hands, right?" Still bitter about not being able to have sex with me while I'm on my period, he shot back, "You have two holes, right?" I give up. FML
Today, thinking my girlfriend had left her little black thong in the dryer to tease me, I sent her a picture of me seductively posing with it. She didn't text back, but a few hours later my 16 year old daughter asked if she'd left anything in the dryer. FML
by Anonymous / 03/11/2013 at 5:52pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by themouseman1212 / 03/10/2013 at 12:13pm / United States / Intimacy
by cremyfrozentreat / 03/10/2013 at 9:40am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by lolk / 03/10/2013 at 3:41am / United States (Arkansas) / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML
by RedWaters / 03/06/2013 at 3:20pm / United States / Intimacy
by married an old man / 03/05/2013 at 12:57pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Thankshun / 03/04/2013 at 6:03pm / United States / Intimacy
by Ihatemylife / 03/03/2013 at 7:17am / Slovenia (Bohinj) / Intimacy
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and after a while, she moved her hand down to my crotch. She felt my erection, then got up and yelled at me, calling me a horny pig for "assuming we were going to have sex." FML
by sn-511 / 03/01/2013 at 5:54pm / Italy (Campania) / Intimacy
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…
- Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he was fingering me. After he left, my mum says to me… Today, my boyfriend gave me a long, philosophical explanation about how he doesn't love me, but we… Today, I lost my virginity, I think. Does it still count if she left halfway through, laughing? FML