Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

jewelz1012

Search for a member

jewelz1012
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 2 September 1995 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 350
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About jewelz1012 : I like hanging with my friends
I love going to football and baseball games
And if we're being honest here I enjoy sick humor; isn't that why we're all on fml!?!
My nicknames: Trouble and Jewelz

jewelz1012's last visitors

SierraaaNicoleeeFactorXIIIGeary519jrtitus51JamadellicHowieDoItGabrielleFrancemiwakobrysonholleyWearingHatspantherfan0877Coop817

jewelz1012's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of jewelz1012's badges

jewelz1012's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend of nine months made a huge scene in public, calling me a "cheating bastard" because she saw me with another woman at the library. That "other woman" is my Calculus tutor. FML

#20514871
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24903) - you deserved it (2043)

On 02/20/2013 at 1:20pm - love - by ? - United States (California)

Today, I uploaded the first chapter of my best writing yet to a popular writing website. After ten minutes, I was thrilled to already see one review and five comments. Each comment was telling me to immediately delete the story because of how horrible it was. The rating was half a star. FML

#20514789
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20682) - you deserved it (6804)

On 02/20/2013 at 11:36am - work - by Apparently not a writer (woman) - United States (Delaware)

Today, I heard a commercial for a great apartment complex. Includes food, snacks, entertainment, activities, cleaning service, and transportation services if you cannot drive yourself. I was really excited until the end when they repeated the name; too bad my perfect place is a senior center. FML

#20514672
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18650) - you deserved it (5849)

On 02/20/2013 at 8:54am - misc - by kryan012 - United States (Georgia)

Today, my son asked me if the short films I write are for little kids or for adults. Since I write horror-filled films, I said it was for adults. He went and told his teacher that I made "adult films". FML

#20514612
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27558) - you deserved it (3118)

On 02/20/2013 at 7:01am - kids - by Laila - United States

Today, I was giving my guy a blowjob. When he blurted out, "Oh Jesus" I assumed I was doing a good job. I looked up to see the expression on his face and noticed a look of terror. He was staring at my growling cat, two seconds away from clawing his face off. FML

#20514475
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27255) - you deserved it (3272)

On 02/20/2013 at 1:55am - intimacy - by jealouspussy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a two dollar raise. Unfortunately, I recently accepted a transfer to a job on the other side of the state to what was, at the time, a more lucrative position. I can't cancel it, so now I get to move into a pay cut. FML

#20514453
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18059) - you deserved it (5012)

On 02/20/2013 at 1:33am - work - by MeanGina (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I've been single for so long my grandmother had to ask if I actually like women or not. FML

#20513781
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20535) - you deserved it (2154)

On 02/19/2013 at 6:07pm - love - by Forever alone Guy - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after being together for only 2 weeks, my boyfriend got me a year's gym membership for my birthday in a card that said, "So u can b hott! Luv u!" FML

#20513755
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22380) - you deserved it (3916)

On 02/19/2013 at 5:47pm - love - by katwingz (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I stayed in a hotel near the college I was applying for a scholarship. We were eating breakfast and there were some other applicants in the breakfast room. As we walked away, my mother yelled, "My daughter's gonna get this scholarship so there's no reason for you muddafuckas to show up." FML

#20511941
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30432) - you deserved it (2127)

On 02/18/2013 at 9:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had to spend a few hours in a hospital with a toddler and a preschooler projecting vomit all over, because my husband thinks "expiration dates are for pussies." FML

#20511774
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29214) - you deserved it (2874)

On 02/18/2013 at 2:44am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my father gave me his blessing to be married on one condition: that I keep my maiden name when I marry. My fiancé thought it would be "epic". My last name will be hyphenated to Cobb-Webb. FML

#20509329
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25891) - you deserved it (3958)

On 02/16/2013 at 10:27am - love - by MsCobb - United States (Ohio)

Today, I moved in with my new dorm mate. I'm prone to very frequent panic attacks that can only be alleviated by cold air. My roommate is severely anemic, and has violent shivering fits when the temperature is below 80. No matter what, one of us is always shaking uncontrollably. FML

Today, my mother started cursing at a lady for tooting her horn at her in traffic, because there was "no need for road rage". When I tried to calm her down, she slammed on the brakes and told me to get out and walk. FML

#20509033
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21842) - you deserved it (2984)

On 02/16/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by howannoying - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend. He put me up against the wall and I yelled, "Harder!" without thinking. I heard the entire house go silent, my dad and his friends included. FML

#20508952
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12678) - you deserved it (37254)

On 02/16/2013 at 12:27am - intimacy - by uhoh (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while at the store with my mom, we ran into the girl I recently confessed to being interested in. My mom decided to shout, "IS THAT HER?! IS THAT THE GIRL YOU LIKE?!" Embarrassed, I desperately told her to be quiet. She grounded me for being "rude" to her. FML

#20508609
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27484) - you deserved it (2094)

On 02/15/2013 at 7:39pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Italy (Lombardia)



FML's blog

  • Sharina's Illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! Glad to see you all again, hope you’re doing fine and dandy. We are, amazing stuff has happened in amongst all the drudge and sludge. We’ve spent the week listening to the greatest album ever…

Friday 24 May 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: