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Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I woke up early, went to the gym, then came home and showered. When I went into my room to change, my mom woke up and started pounding on my door, screaming about how lazy and useless I was for sleeping so late. When I tried to tell her otherwise, she grounded me for "talking back". FML
I agree, your life sucks (30822) - you deserved it (1761)
On 06/19/2013 at 11:29am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)
Today, I woke up to my bratty younger sister cutting through my hair with a pair of scissors. I now look like a freak, and my mum bitched me out for being angry, all because my sister claimed she'd been sleep-walking. Her demented smirk said otherwise. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39174) - you deserved it (2104)
On 06/16/2013 at 2:49pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)
Today, my husband of 3 years learned that he's going to be a father. No, I'm not pregnant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50274) - you deserved it (2956)
On 06/15/2013 at 12:28am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I attended my mother's funeral. My husband came too, and during the service, I kept hearing him giggling. I wrote it off as the usual awkward nerves, until he started snorting too, and I caught sight of the iPhone under his jacket. He was reading this very site. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48758) - you deserved it (3212)
On 06/14/2013 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Cyprus (Limassol)
Today, I accidentally left some music playing on my iPad, then left to do some errands. When I came back, I found it smashed into a million pieces. Apparently, grandpa couldn't find any other way to "shut off that goddamn music." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41789) - you deserved it (9244)
On 06/12/2013 at 5:45pm - misc - by MsGlaDos - United States (Texas)
Today, after years of faking pleasure with my boyfriend, I visited the gynaecologist. As soon as she touched my privates I instinctively let out a fake moan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23883) - you deserved it (55970)
On 06/11/2013 at 11:06pm - intimacy - by instinct (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I decided to try wearing eyeshadow, even though I'm not that girly. When I asked for help after several failed attempts, my sister walked in and said, "It's easy, just do what I do." She put the makeup on herself and looked amazing. She's eight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40938) - you deserved it (5272)
On 06/11/2013 at 12:11pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my co-workers figured out that I was in high school when my husband was in kindergarten. They won't stop calling me a "cougar". FML
I agree, your life sucks (26460) - you deserved it (40573)
On 06/10/2013 at 11:19pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (41175) - you deserved it (51074)
On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I let my step-father know exactly what I thought of him. After a few moments of awkward silence, he leaned towards me and quietly whispered, "Well you're adopted. Your parents never loved you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (47552) - you deserved it (11618)
On 06/05/2013 at 11:24am - misc - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States
Today, I found my husband farting on my pillows, bare ass. His only words were, "This isn't what it looks like." FML
I agree, your life sucks (45690) - you deserved it (4028)
On 06/05/2013 at 11:08am - misc - by Thanks Honey (woman) - United States
Today, I took a dump in the woods at a secluded lake. I used the leaves of a seemingly harmless tree to clean myself. However, I was unaware that the leaf was poisonous. It feels like a thousand hornets are attacking my ass-crack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29188) - you deserved it (42907)
On 06/04/2013 at 1:15pm - health - by poisonivyretard (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, my cats were making a ton of noise rolling around and fighting over their toys, and I yelled for them to knock it off. When they looked up at me, their "toy" ran away. Not a toy, but a real mouse. It's been 2 hours, and I still can't find it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35227) - you deserved it (9337)
On 06/04/2013 at 12:28pm - animals - by drkate25 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my brother looked me dead in the eyes and said his life goal is to find a way to jizz on everyone in the world. I'm scared. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43272) - you deserved it (3474)
On 06/03/2013 at 4:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Poland (Kujawsko-Pomorskie)
Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML
I agree, your life sucks (59518) - you deserved it (3298)
On 06/02/2013 at 2:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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