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jess6blondie9

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jess6blondie9
  • Town/Country : America
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 27 January 1996 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 11040
  • Number of comments : 1363
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About jess6blondie9 : In a world of fakes, I keep it real.

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jess6blondie9's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to a mosquito feeding on my morning wood; probably the only thing that will ever suck my penis. FML

#16277810
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52230) - you deserved it (7877)

On 05/21/2011 at 5:07am - intimacy - by no one - United States (Alaska)

Today, I woke up to a mosquito feeding on my morning wood; probably the only thing that will ever suck my penis. FML

#16277810
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52230) - you deserved it (7877)

On 05/21/2011 at 5:07am - intimacy - by no one - United States (Alaska)

Today, I woke up to a mosquito feeding on my morning wood; probably the only thing that will ever suck my penis. FML

#16277810
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52230) - you deserved it (7877)

On 05/21/2011 at 5:07am - intimacy - by no one - United States (Alaska)

Today, while trying to sneak out of my house to go to a party I met my mom trying to sneak back in. FML

Today, I had to take care of my best friend while she was drunk. This meant changing her pee-soaked sheets, making her take a bath to get all the baby powder off, and making her put clothes on as she tried to run out the house naked. FML

#16277369
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26379) - you deserved it (3862)

On 05/21/2011 at 3:20am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I asked my husband, of only a year, why we don't have sex anymore. He said it's because he masturbates. When I asked how often he did it, he replied "Every day that we don't have sex..." FML

#16277359
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30959) - you deserved it (8721)

On 05/21/2011 at 3:18am - intimacy - by btswc - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I had my new girlfriend over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, my dad started poking her with his fork. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he barked back, "Just making sure she isn't a blow-up doll!" FML

#16271302
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37870) - you deserved it (3941)

On 05/20/2011 at 7:30pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got motion sickness while having sex. FML

#16265516
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36225) - you deserved it (5968)

On 05/20/2011 at 10:39am - intimacy - by mikeycoco -

Today, my boyfriend refused to go down on me because I smelled of baby lotion and it made him feel like a child molester. FML

#16263681
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37454) - you deserved it (14620)

On 05/20/2011 at 4:40am - intimacy - by skiittlez713 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my family went to Seaworld. When we got there, my dad sarcastically told me not to get lost, because I might get mistaken for Shamu. FML

#16255718
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33116) - you deserved it (6990)

On 05/19/2011 at 6:46pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I woke up in a panic to what sounded like a plane about to crash into my house. I was so scared, I peed myself and passed out. It was just my cell phone vibrating under my pillow. FML

#16252216
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12027) - you deserved it (41817)

On 05/19/2011 at 1:38pm - misc - by esoog - United States (California)

Today, I finally started my dream job. I turned up for work with a huge smile on my face. Imagine how much my face dropped when I saw that I had to share an office with the girl I stood up last weekend. FML

#16251176
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8312) - you deserved it (65801)

On 05/19/2011 at 11:13am - work - by Username -

Today, I finally started my dream job. I turned up for work with a huge smile on my face. Imagine how much my face dropped when I saw that I had to share an office with the girl I stood up last weekend. FML

#16251176
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8312) - you deserved it (65801)

On 05/19/2011 at 11:13am - work - by Username -

Today, I went shopping with my cousin. Walking down the road, I heard her say "Can you hold my hand?" I was confused, but thought it was cute, so I held her hand and kept walking. It turns out she'd asked me to hold her bag. We didn't say another word after that. FML

#16250181
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25795) - you deserved it (6955)

On 05/19/2011 at 8:51am - misc - by awkwardd (man) - Hong Kong

Today, I got pulled over for going about 88mph. When the cop asked why I was speeding, I replied, "I was trying to go back in time". He didn't like that answer and gave me a ticket. FML

#16248002
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10450) - you deserved it (61181)

On 05/19/2011 at 1:30am - work - by 613tanner -



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