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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
TODAY, LIKE EVERY DAY, I USED MY PHONE WHILE TAKING A DUMP. AS I REACHED FOR SOME TOILET PAPER TO WIPE MYSELF, MY SISTER POUNDED ON THE DOOR FOR ME TO HURRY UP. I YELLED "FINE," AND WITHOUT REALIZING IT, WIPED MYSELF WITH MY PHONE. FML
Today I finished a very important but annoying presentation that took four hours to complete. Only looool after writing a paragraph to explain the presentation an sending it to my boss did I realize that I saved the document as ( Shit I have to do to get a promotion. ) mega FML
Today, I was watcing wrestling videos on YouTube,en my little broter walked in. Later, my little broter told my parents tat I was watcing naked men on my computer. Tey won't stop tinking tat I was watcing gay porn. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with husband on our anniversary day. He climbd on top of me an firmly placd his penis on nose. When I askd him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter an said I lookd just like Squidward. FML
Today... for the first time... I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer... I was ecstatic. Later...hen I was in the shower... my brother snuck in the bathroom... yelled "Napalm strike!" an threw our cat over the shower curtain lyk a furry grenade from hell. FML
Today.. . since I was taking a dump in mah wife's parents house.. . I lit a candle so that it wouldn't stink . While still sitting down.. . I went to blow it out an apparently.. . no matter how strong of a man u are.. . u will still scream lyk a little grl if hot wax falls on your penis . FML
Friday 27 March 2015