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hplover32

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hplover32
  • Town/Country : Smalltown, USA
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 October 1977 (36 years)
  • Number of visits : 518
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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hplover32's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally summed up the courage to break up with my abusively controlling girlfriend. I don't know what I was thinking, but instead of leaving as a free man, I left as an engaged one. FML

#19705817
363 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14933) - you deserved it (37859)

On 05/30/2012 at 6:35pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Italy (Lombardia)

Today, I realized I've been confusing scenes from The Lord of the Rings with American history. FML

#19339659
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6093) - you deserved it (21059)

On 03/24/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by Avery - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I have never read any of the Harry Potter books. FML

#18781684
524 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28890) - you deserved it (52000)

On 01/12/2012 at 12:36am - love - by Nate (man) - United States

Today, I drove to the liquor store completely naked except for my dressing gown, with a carload of idiot stoners who ran in and stole vodka, tequila and whiskey. We drank in a bush. Last week I was a good citizen, and now I'm white trash. I'm not quite sure what happened in between. FML

#17908235
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7017) - you deserved it (55770)

On 10/04/2011 at 11:28pm - misc - by danii - Reserved

Today, a man punched me for sleeping with his wife. Bewildered, I insisted I would never sleep with a married woman, to which he retorted "She wasn't my wife when it HAPPENED, dumbass!" I was assaulted for sleeping with my own girlfriend three years ago. FML

#17848518
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41017) - you deserved it (3192)

On 09/27/2011 at 3:53pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had to utter the phrase "OK, but no cape during sex" to my girlfriend. FML

Today, I heard that a boy in my class had written a song about me. Intrigued, I went to see him perform. I spent 3 excruciating minutes listening to a song about 'the girl of his dreams', his tear-filled eyes staring into mine the whole time. I have to sit next to this freak for the next 2 years. FML

#17488999
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13625) - you deserved it (47484)

On 08/16/2011 at 9:20am - love - by worried (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I started to fall in love with my wife again. We are in the middle of a divorce. FML

#17457372
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35605) - you deserved it (15703)

On 08/13/2011 at 3:25am - love - by badass - United States

Today, my dad came home from work complaining about all the people he'd seen. He said he doesn't understand why so many people with problems have to confide in him. He's a psychologist. FML

#16999068
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26597) - you deserved it (2549)

On 07/06/2011 at 10:52am - misc - by siighh - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our child might not be mine because he was cheating on me when I got pregnant. FML

#16912974
441 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59493) - you deserved it (6231)

On 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend said that to be extra careful he's been taking my birth control pills too. FML

#16879378
360 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58164) - you deserved it (7218)

On 06/27/2011 at 9:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was reading a crappy "How to spice up your marriage" book with my husband for laughs. One of the ideas was for the guy to whip his knob out, stand behind his girl and say "Can you say that into the microphone?" Now he does it every chance he gets, and I fall for it EVERY TIME. FML

#16542323
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10129) - you deserved it (36663)

On 06/07/2011 at 3:50am - intimacy - by Kate (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I made the discovery that I'm in a true love triangle; both of my girlfriends are dating one another. FML

#14948891
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12836) - you deserved it (57366)

On 02/12/2011 at 11:52am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML

#14190460
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37323) - you deserved it (9474)

On 12/13/2010 at 12:35pm - intimacy - by Wisconsin love - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I started making love to my wife as soon as the kids were occupied. She just laid there the whole time and never responded, except for a few times to say "Ouch." FML

#13439564
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27004) - you deserved it (8881)

On 10/13/2010 at 10:13pm - intimacy - by ahddib - United States (Alabama)



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