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havok87

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havok87

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 1511
  • Number of comments : 106
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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havok87's page activity

Visits<b>cookiecake97</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 1:23am<b>Jabberwockyy</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 8:41am<b>anonchick44889</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 12:27am<b>supernaturalcat</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 6:23pm<b>MickiJ</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 1:55pm<b>Dusk_Shores</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 9:27am<b>kmj3637</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 3:33pm<b>noncom</b> - the 04/21/2013 at 11:47am<b>NagainaFier</b> - the 04/16/2013 at 10:52pm<b>SillyGirl4602</b> - the 03/12/2013 at 3:53am<b>Werken247</b> - the 01/28/2013 at 12:52pm<b>Wedees</b> - the 01/28/2013 at 10:02am

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havok87's favorite FMLs

Today, I was screamed at and told that I was denying someone's "second amendment" by not letting him through with a gun. I work at the border; he was trying to enter Canada. This is not the first time, and it probably won't be the last. FML

#20586134
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40108) - you deserved it (4862)

On 04/12/2013 at 6:23am - work - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, thinking I was alone at work, I did an impression of Goldar from Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I turned around to find out I wasn't alone; a cute girl was staring at me, unimpressed. FML

#20582957
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26945) - you deserved it (18608)

On 04/09/2013 at 10:44pm - work - by Goldar - United States

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

#20582197
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47384) - you deserved it (4883)

On 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my halitosis was so bad that when I blew onto my solution in chemistry class, it reacted. FML

#20582010
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30068) - you deserved it (9708) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/09/2013 at 6:29am - health - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I took an incredibly painful dump. After I cleaned myself up, I got up and was about to flush, until I saw something moving around in one of the logs of poop. It looked like an earthworm. It wasn't there when I sat down. FML

#20576240
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43898) - you deserved it (4402)

On 04/05/2013 at 2:51pm - health - by what if I'm being eaten from the inside out? oh my god (man) - Singapore

Today, my fiancé dumped me because he claimed he needed to "focus on his career and his engagement." When I asked him how dumping me would help with his engagement, he immediately replied with, "No, I mean my other one." FML

#20569834
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46924) - you deserved it (3300)

On 04/01/2013 at 10:50am - love - by t.hughes (woman) - United States

Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML

#20565460
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44494) - you deserved it (15113)

On 03/29/2013 at 1:18pm - misc - by fucked by sex ed (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I walked into the room naked while my wife was on the computer to surprise her. She smiled, put down her laptop and left for the bathroom so I started jerking it in anticipation. It was really feeling good until my wife's best friend, who was on Skype, started giggling. FML

#20550602
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49095) - you deserved it (21982)

On 03/19/2013 at 8:31am - intimacy - by fredo (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, during a silent breathing meditation at the Buddhist center, I accidentally let one rip which echoed through the meditation chamber. If that wasn't bad enough, the follow-up odor was enough to fell a charging rhinoceros. FML

#20517185
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24590) - you deserved it (7251)

On 02/22/2013 at 2:57am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML

#20512577
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38611) - you deserved it (3061)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to my white girlfriend that dating me doesn't give her the right to call my mother the n-word. FML

#20507523
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39927) - you deserved it (8541)

On 02/14/2013 at 11:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my overprotective father. My boyfriend started out with, "Sir, it is an honor to be your daughter's sexual partner." FML

#20497837
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57516) - you deserved it (10887)

On 02/08/2013 at 2:13am - intimacy - by mydadsgonnakillme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking at engagement rings. When the store owner asked about our budget, my boyfriend said with a straight face, "Nothing too expensive, I have a big penis so I don't have to overcompensate by buying a big diamond." FML

#20494997
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34613) - you deserved it (6697)

On 02/05/2013 at 9:31pm - love - by NewlyDread (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was dragged to a Super Bowl party. While there, the host's kid threw 3 cups of apple sauce at my feet, which then exploded and covered my jeans. 10 minutes later, the host's wife announced that she was pregnant with twins. All I could come up with was, "You're making more!?" FML

#20492510
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33150) - you deserved it (5779)

On 02/04/2013 at 12:15am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I had to slowly explain to my son that an "analogy" is a literary device, not a genre of porn. FML

#20481338
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27451) - you deserved it (3059)

On 01/27/2013 at 1:50pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)



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