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havok87

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havok87

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2138
  • Number of comments : 112
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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havok87's page activity

Visits<b>izkiz</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 10:22am<b>cookiecake97</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 1:23am<b>Jabberwockyy</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 8:41am<b>anonchick44889</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 12:27am<b>supernaturalcat</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 6:23pm<b>MickiJ</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 1:55pm<b>Dusk_Shores</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 9:27am<b>noncom</b> - the 04/21/2013 at 11:47am<b>NagainaFier</b> - the 04/16/2013 at 10:52pm<b>SillyGirl4602</b> - the 03/12/2013 at 3:53am<b>Werken247</b> - the 01/28/2013 at 12:52pm<b>Wedees</b> - the 01/28/2013 at 10:02am

havok87's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of havok87's badges

havok87's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my roommate secretly edited a paper I wrote and recently turned in, so that it repeatedly refers to the famed author "Kneel Gayman." I'm positive that's not how it's spelled. FML

#20958782
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34752) - you deserved it (3106)

On 11/15/2013 at 3:30pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44541) - you deserved it (5400)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend left me for another girl. My dad's reaction to the news and my tears was to say, "Aww. Gonna write a song about it, Taylor Swift?" FML

#20942725
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54569) - you deserved it (7952)

On 11/02/2013 at 4:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland

Today, while driving in the car with my father, he handed me his iPhone and asked me to Google "Is ObamaCare good for our country?" As soon as I typed in "Is", the first result was "Is olive oil good for anal." FML

#20942318
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59388) - you deserved it (5651)

On 11/02/2013 at 9:21am - intimacy - by justme - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out my handwriting is so bad that people think I write in Arabic. FML

#20922701
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43561) - you deserved it (9717)

On 10/16/2013 at 1:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went on a first date. He left me standing at a bus stop while he took a dump in some bushes. FML

#20922179
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48262) - you deserved it (4381)

On 10/15/2013 at 11:10pm - love - by highlydisgusted - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my grandmother called me in a fit of panic because her new neighbors are black. So is my fiancé, whom she is supposed to meet tomorrow. FML

#20921768
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47047) - you deserved it (4702)

On 10/15/2013 at 5:43pm - misc - by secretsmakefriends (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I am 20 weeks pregnant. My fiancé has decided my new nickname will be "Oink Oink". FML

#20917413
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42137) - you deserved it (4676)

On 10/12/2013 at 9:19am - love - by oink oink... - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a new client on my massage list. Two of my fingers got stuck in the thick coat of hair covering his back. I had to stop myself from making grunting noises whilst extricating them. FML

#20914768
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38372) - you deserved it (2952)

On 10/10/2013 at 1:25am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I started to come to during dental surgery. I clearly heard someone behind me say "Shit! Get this fucker back under!" then another person mentioning they'd have to kill me to avoid "another lawsuit", followed by laughter and the blackness of sleep. FML

#20909921
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59240) - you deserved it (3548)

On 10/06/2013 at 5:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband yelled from upstairs, "Babe! BABE, COME QUICK!" Terrified that something might have happened to our newborn daughter, I rushed up, only to find out he just wanted to show me that he'd learned how to spin a top on the tip of his penis without it falling. FML

#20908628
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50547) - you deserved it (6824)

On 10/05/2013 at 5:28pm - intimacy - by -____- (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, while in class, I had to sneeze. Not wanting to make a lot of noise, I held it in, only to instead let out a huge, long fart. Everyone, including the teacher, turned and stared at me intently. FML

#20901889
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44869) - you deserved it (7653)

On 09/30/2013 at 12:22pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, I went to a really important job interview. During it, I accidentally let out a burp, came down with nervous hiccups, and when I tried to quietly ease out some painful gas that was building up, it came out as a massive, rancid fart. I'll definitely be unemployed for a while yet. FML

#20898243
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42384) - you deserved it (9601)

On 09/27/2013 at 5:33pm - work - by ;_;" (woman) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, my husband wanted me to "spice up" our sex life. I guess he didn't count on me vomiting when he came in my mouth. We won't be getting intimate again for a long, long time now. FML

#20888582
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50769) - you deserved it (11377)

On 09/20/2013 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was at work at Krispy Kreme for national "talk like a pirate" day. If you dressed like a pirate you'd get a free dozen donuts. A man came in with just an eyepatch on. Thinking he was trying to get a free dozen, I told him he needed to try harder. Turned out the eyepatch was real. FML

#20888238
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45126) - you deserved it (12511)

On 09/19/2013 at 8:47pm - work - by Jamie - United States (Virginia)



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