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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, a few of my friends and I went laser tagging. I had been smart enough to wear black since I know white glows in the dark. Unfortunately, the dandruff glowing in my hair gave me away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14062) - you deserved it (5651)
On 11/27/2012 at 12:06am - misc - by tarlyo2012 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he'd rather play the new Assassin's Creed game or have a night of sex with me. He started crying from indecision. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26110) - you deserved it (9194)
On 11/24/2012 at 8:54am - intimacy - by ladylol (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)
Today, I got into a car accident. The guy wouldn't give me his information, but instead stood there saying, "Like a good neighbor, Statefarm is there." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19850) - you deserved it (1209)
On 11/24/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Read The Fine Print - United States (California)
Today, I was rejected for a dream photography job that involves travelling all over the world, because according to the interviewer, half the photos in my nature portfolio were "blatantly photoshopped." I guess reality isn't realistic enough for some people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18261) - you deserved it (1014)
On 11/23/2012 at 8:29pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5386) - you deserved it (26380)
On 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by nekkidness (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37641) - you deserved it (4966)
On 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I stepped outside the house with my wife. She looked up at the sky and asked me in all seriousness if stars are man-made. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13955) - you deserved it (2115)
On 11/09/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by baby, baby no (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, it's the five year anniversary of the day I broke up with my girlfriend to see other people. I've not had sex a single time since. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7765) - you deserved it (38542)
On 10/27/2012 at 12:04am - intimacy - by Cslouth - United States (New York)
Today, while walking on a nearly empty street, my friend dared me to slap a tall muscular chick on the butt and run away. I went and did it, but before I even had a chance to turn and run, she grabbed me, bent me over her knee and spanked me until I cried. My friend filmed it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5122) - you deserved it (33449)
On 10/24/2012 at 1:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I went to the Natural History Museum with my boyfriend. While we were standing in front of real dinosaur bones, he told me he didn't believe in dinosaurs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18573) - you deserved it (2161)
On 10/23/2012 at 9:19pm - love - by SFra - United States
Today, at work as a massage therapist, I pulled down the guy's blanket slightly to massage his lower back. There were shit stains spreading from his ass crack all the way to his mid-back. When I told him, he wanted me to massage there anyway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21907) - you deserved it (969)
On 10/22/2012 at 12:07am - work - by Lunazel93 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, while my mother's blind friend was waiting in our kitchen for my mom to come home, I thought it would be funny to talk to her in the nude. Turns out she's only blind in one eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4144) - you deserved it (36210)
On 10/21/2012 at 8:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, while my mother's blind friend was waiting in our kitchen for my mom to come home, I thought it would be funny to talk to her in the nude. Turns out she's only blind in one eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4144) - you deserved it (36210)
On 10/21/2012 at 8:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, my dad saw on TV that in some parts of Africa, it's not uncommon for people to attach make-shift flamethrowers to their cars to defend against carjackers. He's now lost his mind and is forcing me to help him put one together to scare off Jehovah's Witnesses. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12446) - you deserved it (1297)
On 10/19/2012 at 5:39pm - misc - by Watchtower? More like fortress. (man) - Norway (Oslo)
Today, I yet again had to explain to my boyfriend that, yes, I can get pregnant even if I don't actually have an orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23914) - you deserved it (3090)
On 10/04/2012 at 11:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)
Monday 20 May 2013
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