hannah_lynn

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hannah_lynn

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2918
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About hannah_lynn : Hi
I'm Hannah and I like The Maine more than you

hannah_lynn's page activity

Visits<b>AyeTee77</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 2:16pm<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 11:19pm<b>TheAsianStefan</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 12:28pm<b>thatguyybrian</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 2:25pm<b>imalosertho</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 3:54am<b>Door_Productions</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 5:12am<b>coleh1998</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 10:50pm<b>keatshire</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 11:46pm<b>suslord</b> - the 12/18/2013 at 1:25pm<b>Ohotsk</b> - the 12/03/2013 at 2:57pm<b>Codezlol</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 12:31pm<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 11/20/2013 at 10:59am<b>JMichael</b> - the 11/20/2013 at 2:09am<b>dre82</b> - the 10/30/2013 at 7:36am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 10/23/2013 at 6:48pm<b>DWordHead16</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 3:29am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 12:35pm<b>I_Am_A_Rock</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 12:48am

hannah_lynn's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

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hannah_lynn's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my boyfriend to give me a back rub. He claimed that he had a sore hand, so I retorted, "You have two hands, right?" Still bitter about not being able to have sex with me while I'm on my period, he shot back, "You have two holes, right?" I give up. FML

by Lilypad / 03/11/2013 at 8:21pm / Intimacy

Today, thinking my girlfriend had left her little black thong in the dryer to tease me, I sent her a picture of me seductively posing with it. She didn't text back, but a few hours later my 16 year old daughter asked if she'd left anything in the dryer. FML

by Anonymous / 03/11/2013 at 5:52pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I saw a woman breastfeeding at the natural foods market. It's the first time I've seen a woman's nipple in over two years. I've been married for ten. FML

by themouseman1212 / 03/10/2013 at 12:13pm / United States / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML

by RedWaters / 03/06/2013 at 3:20pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, while mopping floors at the police station, an inmate pissed on the floor, demanded that I suck his dick, begged me for a glass of water and finally informed me that he would kill my family. I said nothing and he started weeping softly. I laughed, but slipped in his piss and broke my arm. FML

by JimmyT / 03/03/2013 at 5:21pm / Norway (Hordaland) / Work

Today, my fiancé is returning home, so I decided to wax myself, thinking things would get intimate. I warmed the wax strips and set them on the counter. Our cat jumped onto the counter and managed to roll onto one of the strips. Suffice to say, the wrong pussy got a painful waxing. FML

by Anonymous / 02/25/2013 at 12:57pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, after months of a very healthy sex life with my boyfriend, he asked me to let him try anal. I'm dead-set against it, so I tried to let him down easy by jokingly saying that I would, but only if he let me try it on him first. He said, "Sure." Fuck. FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2013 at 1:27pm / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Intimacy

Today, I went on a date with a very cute girl. It went well, until I accidentally called the blueberries in her dessert Oran Berries. I sheepishly explained that they're a berry from the Pokémon universe, at which point she excused herself, never to return. FML

by Brock / 02/02/2013 at 4:20pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Love

Today, after much self-doubt and awkwardness, I learned that I look amazing in a little black dress. Now I have to figure out what I'm going to tell my wife. FML

by ohfuckwaffles / 01/29/2013 at 12:28am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, someone put a whole packet of glitter on the blades of my ceiling fan. Too bad I only noticed when I turned it on. FML

by hopelessteej / 01/28/2013 at 8:55am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my school's ski trip got canceled, because "All the snow makes the roads unsafe." We can't go skiing because it's snowing. FML

by Anonymous / 01/25/2013 at 5:41pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom went to court to finalize her divorce. I would have felt sorry for her, had this not been her 7th husband. FML

by HereWeGoAgain / 01/24/2013 at 2:19am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend found out you can use food coloring in anything. Everything she cooks is now in bright neon colors. I feel like I'm in a Dr Seuss book. FML

by Anonymous / 01/23/2013 at 8:44pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my school's theatre decided to produce Les Misérables. I got the part of Éponine. My boyfriend, being a talented performer, could have gotten any part he wanted. However, he only wanted to play the soldier responsible for killing Éponine. FML

by Anonymous / 01/23/2013 at 1:03pm / United States / Love

Today, after applying for a job at a tanning salon, I was told they don't hire "naturally tan" people. I'm black. FML

by Anonymous / 01/21/2013 at 7:48am / United States (Maryland) / Work