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hannaaaahr

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hannaaaahr
  • Town/Country : Utrecht, The Netherlands
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 6 March 1996 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 3040
  • Number of comments : 260
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 4 posted

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An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

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hannaaaahr's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend, who recently started French classes, and I were having sex. Knowing how whispering in my ear turns me on, she whispered something in French, and I came. Later I found out it meant something like, "You should lose a lot of weight." FML

#12776865
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23619) - you deserved it (7738)

On 08/27/2010 at 8:18pm - intimacy - by gleefan116 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got back from a two week holiday only to discover my dog missing. After looking for him at animal shelters and putting up missing pet signs, my room mate admitted he lost him in a game of drunk poker. FML

#12649118
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35996) - you deserved it (2863)

On 08/20/2010 at 6:03pm - animals - by therealducktape - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend and I ordered pizza and watched a movie. After dinner we started to make out. I began to take my clothes off when he stopped me. He said that sex is exercise and you can't exercise for 30 minutes after eating. FML

#12463694
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33254) - you deserved it (7508)

On 08/11/2010 at 9:54pm - intimacy - by oumalina (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to get bloodwork done. I'm deathly afraid of needles. The whole lobby heard me scream as soon as the nurse said 'hello'. FML

#12082057
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15625) - you deserved it (23585)

On 07/24/2010 at 6:50am - health - by breathexali (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my dad screamed at me, called me a monster, told me he wanted me to move out, and that I better start looking for an apartment. Why? I slammed the microwave door. FML

#10652042
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33777) - you deserved it (6760)

On 05/20/2010 at 5:32pm - misc - by fml - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my dad screamed at me, called me a monster, told me he wanted me to move out, and that I better start looking for an apartment. Why? I slammed the microwave door. FML

#10652042
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33777) - you deserved it (6760)

On 05/20/2010 at 5:32pm - misc - by fml - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my girlfriend left me for my best friend. Over a text message with "lol" in it. FML

#10546987
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39186) - you deserved it (3285)

On 05/15/2010 at 1:07pm - love - by schwange (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML

#9110965
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37252) - you deserved it (8008)

On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, when I went to see a movie with my best friend, and there were 3 girls loudly discussing blow job techniques. I texted my boyfriend about how gross the conversation was. His reply was "Pay attention. You might learn something." FML

#8966717
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10364) - you deserved it (22797)

On 03/10/2010 at 6:05am - intimacy - by ohno - United States

Today, I'm a 25-year-old married woman and I'm currently living with my grandfather to take care of him. Today, he grounded me. FML

#8766084
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25926) - you deserved it (3421)

On 03/02/2010 at 1:46am - misc - by grounded. - United States (Delaware)

Today, I learnt that if you accidentally sit on a hamster, instead of dying, it bites your testicles. FML

#8742333
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8157) - you deserved it (33813)

On 03/01/2010 at 4:13am - animals - by ItHurtsLIkeHell (man) - Malaysia (Pulau Pinang)

Today, I brought my new girlfriend over to show off to my family when my senile great-grandmother walked into the room wearing nothing but her underpants asking when the Olympics come on. FML

#8366162
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18407) - you deserved it (1688)

On 02/17/2010 at 2:30am - misc - by unfortunate419 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, there was a new and extremely attractive girl at youth group, so I decided to introduce myself. Her reply was, "Wow, I've always wanted to meet a gay guy!" FML

#7937064
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28499) - you deserved it (3719)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:39pm - love - by Richard - Sent from mobile version

Today, I finally removed my car insurance after realizing it costs too much money. Since I then had more money, I went to celebrate with ice cream. On the way, I got hit by a truck. FML

#7845593
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8898) - you deserved it (45668)

On 02/03/2010 at 12:44pm - money - by jk2010 (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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