About hannaaaahr : I'm not funny, just ironic and mean.
Profile completed
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
The Thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Today, I went on a third date with a guy, hoping that maybe finally I would get some physical interaction. I did. I got a high five. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22423) - you deserved it (5442)
On 01/19/2010 at 9:17am - love - by Sl3vin (woman) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I hurried into the bank to cash in the $5,000 check my grandparents had given me for college money. I found out that instead of my name, they wrote 'our sweet iddle pumpkinbutt'. I couldn't make eye contact with anyone after. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17946) - you deserved it (3177)
On 01/17/2010 at 4:08pm - misc - by pumpkinbutt - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was telling my cousin about my boyfriend, who plays guitar and sings very well, has dark hair, and wears girl pants. After telling her these things, she's quiet for a moment before she looks at me and says, "So... You're dating a Jonas brother?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (6297) - you deserved it (28696)
On 01/16/2010 at 4:05pm - misc - by kikinemo (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I came home from a long day at work to find a path of rose pedals from the front door. Gasping with surprise, I followed it past the living room... past the bedroom... into the kitchen, where there was a note that said "Friends coming over tonight, we need food, love you!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (24084) - you deserved it (2774)
On 01/15/2010 at 3:33am - love - by Romantic (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I went on an interview for a job that I had been wanting for months. I thought everything was going great. On my way out, my interviewer asked me to recycle something for him. I agreed. It was my resume. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24293) - you deserved it (1328)
On 01/13/2010 at 7:05pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26858) - you deserved it (2467)
On 01/10/2010 at 8:10pm - misc - by wowhoopla - Sent from mobile version
Today, I found out that last summer while my girlfriend worked on a Disney Cruise ship, she cheated on me with Tarzan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27100) - you deserved it (1957)
On 01/10/2010 at 4:47pm - misc - by daragnan (man) - United States
Today, I was talking to a hot girl at the bus stop. She seemed interested in me and I was feeling a connection forming. When the bus came, I offered to let her board first, but she said it "wasn't her bus" and said goodbye. Later, I realized I'd spent 20 minutes making moves on a prostitute. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10659) - you deserved it (4547)
On 01/07/2010 at 7:19pm - intimacy - by SlappyMcGee (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, my stepdad did a crap in the shape of the number 2, took a picture of it and showed it to all my friends at my party, while we were eating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24710) - you deserved it (2793)
On 01/01/2010 at 6:12am - misc - by Moosh - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my boyfriend called me 80 times in 5 minutes. I had previously told him I was with my friends. He left me a voicemail proposing saying he loved me to death and he was crying. We've been dating for a week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31528) - you deserved it (3404)
On 12/28/2009 at 8:21pm - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I gave my boyfriend a box of chocolates as a present. A few hours later, he texted me saying that the box of chocolates contained nuts. He's allergic to nuts and his mother now thinks I'm trying to kill him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15958) - you deserved it (7800)
On 12/26/2009 at 11:44pm - love - by Kelly (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my 25 year old brother ran into my room very excited at 8am. "Wake up! We got a new puppy!" he told me. I was so excited so I jumped out of my warm bed. When I asked him if he was serious he said "No, but we have to go to church, so get dressed." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21709) - you deserved it (6760)
On 12/25/2009 at 10:30am - misc - by MessyMal (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I saw my four-year-old son running around outside, and copying everything our dog was doing. I thought it was cute, so I went to grab the camera. When I went back outside, I saw my dog eating a dead rabbit, and my son doing the same. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30434) - you deserved it (4298)
On 12/13/2009 at 7:42pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend and I had our parents over to our new apartment for the first time. We spent hours cleaning, cooking, and making sure everything was "parent-appropriate." Apparently we didn't notice the S and M catalog in the pile on our coffee table... but his mom sure did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4899) - you deserved it (11030)
On 12/13/2009 at 1:55pm - intimacy - by sorrydad (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was sitting on the couch with my 5 year old on my lap. All of a sudden, she turned to me and said, "Daddy, I love your boobies. They're a good pillow." My own kid just called me fat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18552) - you deserved it (12422)
On 12/06/2009 at 3:28pm - kids - by Bill (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
