Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

hannaaaahr

Offline (the 05/04/2015 at 8:55pm) | Search for a member

hannaaaahr

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 6 March 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 8611
  • Number of comments : 260
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

hannaaaahr's page activity

Visits<b>beeferjay</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 12:53am<b>JohnnyKade</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 3:22pm<b>seninaa</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 2:44pm<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 11:59am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 11:31am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 9:29pm<b>queensassygoat</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 11:48pm<b>RoseBlack123</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 11:19pm<b>facelick</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 3:27pm<b>itsb_freed</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 1:22pm<b>Jenmic</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 12:09am<b>pinkpig23</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 11:53pm<b>jjumprope</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 3:46pm<b>Nailpolishaholic</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 11:08am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 3:55am<b>MistyKittyx</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 3:06pm<b>Scarylizard1798</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 4:24pm<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 4:49pm

Fucked!<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 9:55am<b>EvanescenceLuv</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 11:15pm<b>zombiekiller52</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 8:23pm

hannaaaahr's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of hannaaaahr's badges

hannaaaahr's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to put my little sister to bed. Usually my mom sings her a lullaby before she puts her to sleep, so I did too. After I finished the song, my sister looked me dead in the eyes and said, "This is why I tell people we aren't related." FML

#20826525
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48004) - you deserved it (5326)

On 08/08/2013 at 12:09am - kids - by NextAmericanIdol? - United States (Maryland)

Today, my mum picked up a bunch of tissues that were scattered around my room. She examined them, then asked me to stop wasting her potential grandchildren. FML

#20825949
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49745) - you deserved it (40613)

On 08/07/2013 at 6:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Egypt

Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML

#20824961
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50422) - you deserved it (24346)

On 08/07/2013 at 1:40am - animals - by Blood on my hands (woman) - United States

Today, I realized that my anger problems have gotten out of hand, when I shouted "Fuck you!" at my toaster. My mood swings and loneliness have also reached a new high, evidently, as my next actions were to apologize to the appliance and then continue talking to it. FML

#20823279
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46784) - you deserved it (9147)

On 08/06/2013 at 2:19am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up at 6am and went into the kitchen, where I saw a mouse in front of the fridge. Petrified, I stood in the doorway shooing it for a few minutes. My husband then walked into the kitchen, picked up the "mouse", and threw it in the bin. It was a used tea bag. FML

#20823044
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37164) - you deserved it (17857)

On 08/06/2013 at 12:01am - animals - by Tea_baggins (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my husband and I arrived in Barbados on vacation. We visited a club, and they had a selection of drinks with weird names. My husband ordered one called the Raging Bitch, flicked his finger towards me, and said to the barkeeper, "Might as well get something I'm used to." FML

#20820272
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45165) - you deserved it (10398)

On 08/04/2013 at 12:45pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)

Today, the kids I was babysitting somehow found a pair of my underwear. They asked if they could use them to go parachuting. FML

#20819762
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38533) - you deserved it (6363)

On 08/04/2013 at 1:29am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was at the store with my kids. My 5-year-old son wanted to carry the milk carton, so I let him. He dropped it and it spilled. I was really embarrassed. Then he decided to get on the floor and lick the milk off the ground. Everyone stared at me accusingly. FML

#20819263
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44007) - you deserved it (6658)

On 08/03/2013 at 8:46pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I learned a few things. One: friends are assholes. Two: under no circumstance do you close your eyes when they ask you to. Three: getting kicked in the balls hurts a lot. FML

#20818001
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42017) - you deserved it (20890)

On 08/03/2013 at 12:31am - health - by Myballshurt (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was washing up in a public bathroom, when I looked up for a second and saw a kid in the mirror staring back at me. I gasped, as I thought the place had been empty. He whispered, "It's time to die." I screamed and ran out, only to hear him burst out laughing behind me. FML

#20817313
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49973) - you deserved it (8463)

On 08/02/2013 at 4:57pm - misc - by lights on forever (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, I was buying ingredients for a salad. I had only picked up a few cucumbers, when an elderly lady came up to me and murmured, "Make sure you use lots of lube, or that'll hurt. Been there, sweetheart." What the HELL? FML

#20817265
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57066) - you deserved it (5539)

On 08/02/2013 at 4:23pm - misc - by um... what the fuck, miss? (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, after giving me my very first orgasm, my boyfriend sat me down and had a serious chat with me about my orgasm face. Apparently it reminded him of the scene in the Exorcist with the possessed girl, and it really freaked him out. FML

#20816805
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60419) - you deserved it (7651)

On 08/02/2013 at 10:08am - intimacy - by right (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, I took a run in the woods. Almost halfway through, I started to feel like I was going to faint. I was so dizzy that my sight was getting blurry. I went to sit down on what seemed like a rock. It wasn't a rock. It was a huge snapping turtle. FML

#20812086
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51537) - you deserved it (5733)

On 07/30/2013 at 7:19pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I did a photoshoot with my boyfriend and his buddy. We drove out to the countryside and set up on top of a hill. My boyfriend kept having me move further and further back. I eventually fell and rolled down the steep hill, while he and his buddy high-fived each other. FML

#20808454
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47773) - you deserved it (6970)

On 07/28/2013 at 6:58pm - misc - by -_- (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML

#20805312
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58926) - you deserved it (9693)

On 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by turning red - United States



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: