Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

glittertwat

Search for a member

glittertwat

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 28 December 1995 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 388
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About glittertwat : Hi, my name is Sophie.. I like frogs, aliens, and rugby.. Uhm.. Wordswordswords..

glittertwat's page activity

Visits<b>allforyoux3</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 12:59am<b>melinal</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 7:29am<b>TorturedXeno</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 1:55am<b>Wonder_Woman257</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 11:13am<b>Aspireworks</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 10:09pm<b>Slopedaddy</b> - the 09/29/2012 at 1:44pm<b>FuzzyJack</b> - the 08/05/2012 at 7:40am<b>GDIalex</b> - the 04/24/2012 at 6:45pm<b>lovepandorasaver</b> - the 04/24/2012 at 5:57pm

glittertwat's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of glittertwat's badges

glittertwat's favorite FMLs

Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML

#20111886
522 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75096) - you deserved it (8791)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:30am - kids - by wdunn69733 - United States (Georgia)

Today, my 2-year-old told me he found a new finger puppet. It was a used condom. FML

#20080363
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18131) - you deserved it (26595)

On 09/20/2012 at 3:00am - intimacy - by myself - United States (California)

Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML

#19967014
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24818) - you deserved it (4401)

On 07/21/2012 at 4:00am - kids - by It was the 11 year old - United States (Texas)

Today, I let my daughter bake a cake for her brother's fifth birthday party. She showed up later with a cake in the shape of a cock and balls. Apparently it's okay, though, because "I frosted it to look like a rocket, hehehe!" I can't believe my balls spawned this moron. FML

#19867387
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21552) - you deserved it (6046)

On 06/29/2012 at 5:39pm - misc - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I walked in on my dad introducing his stuffed gorilla to his cat. FML

#19625273
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19365) - you deserved it (2471)

On 05/14/2012 at 11:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up after a few friends came over last night. There are eggs, coins and Oreos glued to the ceiling, 10 broken jars, no food left, and most of the contents of my house are in the garden. And I'm naked and covered in permanent marker drawings of Pokémon. My parents return in an hour. FML

#17899100
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11784) - you deserved it (48222)

On 10/03/2011 at 9:19pm - misc - by danii - Reserved

Today, the guy at Subway asked if I wanted to make my sandwich a footlong. I'm not sure what came over me, but before I realized what I was saying, I'd told him that I couldn't handle 12 inches. FML

#17470290
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26349) - you deserved it (9378)

On 08/14/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by Username - United States (New York)

Today, I was introduced to my future stepmother, but it turns out that I already know her. Not only are we the same age and went to the same high school, when we were in the same math class together the teacher would often confuse our names because "we could pass as twins". FML

#4329050
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65325) - you deserved it (2806)

On 08/06/2009 at 4:45am - misc - by whatismydadthinking (woman) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, a man held a door open for me while I fished my umbrella out of my very cluttered bag. As I was opening my umbrella, I turned to thank him for being such a gentleman. Instead, a tampon that had apparently wedged itself into the folds of my umbrella flew into his face. FML

#4001107
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41637) - you deserved it (5350)

On 07/24/2009 at 7:39am - misc - by umbrella (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I was on the phone with a prospective blind date. He asked me to describe myself so I said that I was fun, attractive and a little chubby but not fat. My 7 year old sister walked up to me and screamed "Jesus doesn't like it when we lie!". FML

#2914098
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49341) - you deserved it (14001)

On 06/15/2009 at 3:11pm - love - by apparentlyugly (woman) - United States

Today, I had my first real meeting with my girlfriend's parents. We had dinner at a pretty upscale restaurant and everything was going great. When the check came, I offered to pay and I stood up to take out my wallet. When I opened it, 3 condoms fell out on the table in front of them. FML

#1639101
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18453) - you deserved it (58663)

On 05/04/2009 at 7:27pm - misc - by Brian (man) - United States (New Jersey)



FML's blog

  • Cynthia's illustrated FML
  • TFIF indeed. It's time to kick off the suit and tie and forget about work. Some of us are going out for drinks with friends, others are going to enjoy some live music and some brave fools are going to keep fit…

Friday 28 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: