About fuzz94 : it's not funny unless someone passes out!
steam: qonvict
Beginner
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Mobility
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I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, at my mother's funeral, as everyone was around her casket for the viewing, my 5-year-old son in cluelessness of what was going on shouted, "Grandma is more fun when she isn't sleeping." Everyone cried. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33715) - you deserved it (2277)
On 02/25/2013 at 6:00pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I received my first ever hand-job. It would have been great if she didn't wipe it across my face when I had finished and storm out of the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19284) - you deserved it (3869)
On 11/14/2012 at 4:06am - intimacy - by fuzz94 (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I woke up naked next to my gay roommate after a night of drinking. Neither he nor I remember anything. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17262) - you deserved it (16507)
On 09/22/2012 at 10:06am - intimacy - by holyshitbatman - United States (Illinois)
Today, I found out that Google+ has been automatically uploading my cell phone pictures as I take them. My friends have now seen pictures of me, my penis, and other things too horrifying to talk about. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11928) - you deserved it (30243)
On 01/29/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by brannie - United States
Today, I guess I accidentally left Facebook open on my work computer while I went to the bathroom, because my boss updated my status to "Unemployed." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10961) - you deserved it (43755)
On 01/10/2012 at 10:34am - work - by Needsanewjob (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, despite being 21 years old and living in my own place, my mom still managed to walk in on me whacking off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29531) - you deserved it (7193)
On 12/27/2011 at 2:11am - intimacy - by ikungfuyou (man) - United States
Today, my husband called me to the bedroom to show me something. This "something" was him demonstrating his seemingly well-trained ability to accurately type out a sentence on my phone using nothing but his erect penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23839) - you deserved it (4088)
On 12/16/2011 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by anne (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I talked to my dad about joining the military. He got up, laughed, and said, "As if the army would accept a pussy like you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24255) - you deserved it (4624)
On 12/16/2011 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I found a note on my door that said "I masturbate to your pictures on Facebook." Someone else wrote "like" at the bottom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33352) - you deserved it (7075)
On 11/12/2011 at 12:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42276) - you deserved it (4478)
On 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm - misc - by Mike -
Today, my girlfriend of 3 years left me for a guy whose favorite color is camouflage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28142) - you deserved it (3434)
On 02/24/2010 at 10:29am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I set up a camera in my kitchen to see who was stealing my cookies. Turns out my mom had her boyfriend over. Good news, the cookies are safe. Bad news, I now have something recorded that I never wanted to see in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34829) - you deserved it (9964)
On 07/21/2009 at 10:55am - misc - by Pimp-Daddy (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend when we started messing around. Things were getting really hot when he gets a call from his best friend whose grandfather had just died. As they were talking and I heard her crying, he unzips his pants and mouths, "She won't know." FML
I agree, your life sucks (57632) - you deserved it (5361)
On 04/27/2009 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)
Today, I took the bus to work and a sweet old lady got on after me and sat next to me. Halfway to work, she fell asleep and her head was on my shoulder. Trying to be nice, I gently tried to wake her up before my stop came. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (564034) - you deserved it (35950)
On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1008698) - you deserved it (80188)
On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)
Monday 17 June 2013
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