Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

freakizoid_5000

Search for a member

freakizoid_5000

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 26 December 1980 (33 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 434
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About freakizoid_5000 : NIL

freakizoid_5000's page activity

Visits<b>vtfan2319</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 9:47pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 3:03am

freakizoid_5000's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

freakizoid_5000's favorite FMLs

Today, I injured my knee and dislocated my shoulder fighting over a cookie with my brother. He's 14. I'm 26. He still got the cookie. FML

#12818513
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10715) - you deserved it (32451)

On 08/30/2010 at 6:34am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Oman (Masqat)

Today, I was taking care of a friend's hamster. Thinking the hamster wanted to make a bed, I put some cotton balls in his cage so he would be comfy. He promptly ate them and died. FML

#12781273
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14424) - you deserved it (36316)

On 08/28/2010 at 12:56am - animals - by Kelli (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I came home to see my husband talking to his penis. FML

#12714961
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29039) - you deserved it (10043)

On 08/24/2010 at 2:17am - intimacy - by chewybarseventy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out what people really think about the beard I've been proudly growing for over a month. It appears that my face now looks like an unshaven ballsack. FML

#8968653
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8377) - you deserved it (23188)

On 03/10/2010 at 10:00am - misc - by RyanM (man) - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, I was carrying a hot cup of noodles. I sneezed and accidentally stabbed myself in the forehead with a fork. FML

#8130658
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23119) - you deserved it (4871)

On 02/11/2010 at 1:35pm - misc - by Nick (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was carrying a hot cup of noodles. I sneezed and accidentally stabbed myself in the forehead with a fork. FML

#8130658
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23119) - you deserved it (4871)

On 02/11/2010 at 1:35pm - misc - by Nick (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was on MSN with my friend and my 9 year old brother. My friend asked me for some advice about how to give a guy a good blowjob. I went into great detail, and then realised that I had typed it to the wrong window. I gave my little brother tips on how to perform fellatio. FML

#764991
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23599) - you deserved it (105433)

On 04/02/2009 at 11:34am - intimacy - by imsorrytimmy (woman) - United Kingdom (Wolverhampton)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: