Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

folfg0

Search for a member

folfg0
  • Town/Country : My bed, My room
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 7 August 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 1178
  • Number of comments : 83
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About folfg0 : FML is checked everyday. I don't like being a grammar nazi, especially since I misspell words sometimes. But for the love of Pete. If ur guna tipe rike dis, u bttr b retarted.

folfg0's last visitors

mombostuckVivaLaColdplayjoelpowerBudderchookNooblahRababco

folfg0's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of folfg0's badges

folfg0's favorite FMLs

Today, when I stopped at a light, I tossed a banana peel into a field along the side of the road. The man behind me got out of his car, picked up the banana peel and threw it back into my car at me. When I tried to tell him it was biodegradable, he told me to "stop making up words." FML

#13274886
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21528) - you deserved it (27144)

On 10/01/2010 at 9:47am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my cousin came to visit from America. While out shopping, she said loudly that she was having trouble finding clothes to fit around her huge fanny, causing a lot of people to stare in our direction. I had to explain to her that "fanny" in the UK means "vagina." FML

#12975254
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30137) - you deserved it (3527)

On 09/09/2010 at 10:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found out what "supersoaked" means. I thought it meant getting shot by a water gun, which is why I laughed when my daughter's boyfriend said he "supersoaked" her. FML

#12894594
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29047) - you deserved it (6027)

On 09/04/2010 at 12:15am - intimacy - by FMyLife5915 -

Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little boy on my knee, and he kept pulling at my top. I asked him "are you hungry?" He replied "No, I want to see your titties." FML

#12305756
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35257) - you deserved it (9880)

On 08/04/2010 at 6:25am - intimacy - by Embarressed... (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, my shrink diagnosed me as severely depressive, due to a lot of stress and yells at home. After the session, my parents argued about whose fault it was and then went on to yell at me for being depressive and wasting their money. FML

#9647002
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38380) - you deserved it (3282)

On 04/05/2010 at 6:14am - misc - by blah. - Thailand (Krung Thep)

Today, trying to take initiative, I wore nothing but an apron and led my husband to the kitchen by his knob to have some fun. I tripped on the floor and used his knob to keep balance. FML

#8797344
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18410) - you deserved it (6451)

On 03/03/2010 at 11:22am - intimacy - by Sorry (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned a little lesson about consequences. Yesterday, I ate a quarter as a dare. Today, I tried to poop it out. It got stuck coming out. I had to go to the doctor and explain everything. FML

#8519094
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5005) - you deserved it (41272)

On 02/21/2010 at 2:34pm - misc - by anna14 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while losing my virginity to my boyfriend, I had my first orgasm. I don't remember much of what I said during, but after it was all over, he looks at me and says, "You have terrible grammar during climax." FML

#8265301
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17099) - you deserved it (4590)

On 02/14/2010 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by klsdhjla (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was helping some neighbors corral and tag their cattle. Deciding to take a break, I turned my back to all 3 men and jumped down from an old, rusty gate. Luckily, the sharp piece of metal sticking out of it barely missed my skin. Instead it tore off the ass of both my pants and undies. FML

#8106835
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16043) - you deserved it (4240)

On 02/10/2010 at 9:33pm - work - by roundemup (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was helping some neighbors corral and tag their cattle. Deciding to take a break, I turned my back to all 3 men and jumped down from an old, rusty gate. Luckily, the sharp piece of metal sticking out of it barely missed my skin. Instead it tore off the ass of both my pants and undies. FML

#8106835
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16043) - you deserved it (4240)

On 02/10/2010 at 9:33pm - work - by roundemup (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend kept trying to convince me to do anal with him. After denying him several times he told me "Why it feels good, trust me." I asked him how would he know. There was a long awkward silence when he then replied with "I'm not gay I swear." FML

#7563904
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25242) - you deserved it (3814)

On 01/25/2010 at 3:47am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I took a picture of my "privates" on my girlfriends cell phone and set it as her background without her knowing. Minutes later, I heard her mom scream. She has the same phone. FML

#7492476
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6582) - you deserved it (31877)

On 01/22/2010 at 1:25am - intimacy - by masterzach21 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have a little "fun" in our secluded backyard. It was only after we had finished that we noticed the three little girls, who live next door, jumping up and down on their trampoline, with their mouths wide open. FML

Today, for my art project, I spent hours painting my whole body in black spots with acrylic paint. I then went and stood outside in the snow, naked, so I could take pictures of it. Only then to find out the camera was out of batteries. FML

#7197887
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5821) - you deserved it (22383)

On 01/07/2010 at 11:36am - misc - by Boob (woman) - United Kingdom (Windsor and Maidenhead)

Today, the police called and told me that they had Alex in custody. Apparently, she had public sex with another woman and wants me to come bail her out. Alex is my mom. FML

#7014156
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21539) - you deserved it (1930)

On 12/29/2009 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by runescapeftw (man) - United States (North Carolina)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: