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finnrambo's favorite FMLs
Today, I got a text from my mom saying, "I heard the cupcake store got robbed. Where are you?" Then she texted back, "Oh never mind, they wanted money, not cupcakes. It wasn't you." Very funny, Mom. FML
by cieee / 02/13/2012 at 2:09am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Forever sad / 10/05/2011 at 8:55pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy
Today, while in heavy traffic on the highway, a motorcyclist managed to t-bone my car. He picked himself up, glanced at the side of my car, and quickly drove off, all in the space of a few seconds. I just got an expensive paint job on this thing. FML
by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 4:35am / Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur) / Transportation
Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML
by Anonymous / 09/10/2011 at 2:35am / United States / Intimacy
Today, my wife tried to refill the windshield wiper fluid on her own. However, she poured it where the oil goes. Now the car is having major issues. Last week I lost my job, and I have no idea how much this is going to cost to fix. FML
by BadTime / 08/30/2011 at 5:35am / United States (Colorado) / Money
Today, my girlfriend's overprotective parents decided that I'm a bad influence on their daughter. I'm a straight A engineering student who openly speaks out against drugs, alcohol, and discrimination. Their reason? Someone told them I dyed my hair black. They think I'm a "closet Nazi". FML
by rbeast / 07/21/2011 at 12:10am / United States (Michigan) / Love
Today, after having my car been broken into the day before because I didn't lock it, I made sure I locked my doors. When I got off shift and entered the parking lot, I noticed a brick had been thrown through my windshield and a note that said, "Nice Try". FML
by JohnyP / 07/09/2011 at 3:04am / United States (Ohio) / Transportation
by James64138 / 06/15/2011 at 6:13am / United States / Intimacy
by stepsister / 06/10/2011 at 1:17am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by Devon / 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous
by Spooked / 03/06/2011 at 2:38pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
by Anonymous / 01/28/2011 at 2:55pm / United States (California) / Work
by Anonymous / 01/06/2011 at 12:38pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love
by nemo518 / 12/23/2010 at 1:36am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
- 1Today, it's been six months since my husband and I have miscarried our daughter who we named Hana… 2Today, I discovered, after years of being grounded for losing my belongings, that I didn't actually… 3Today, eight tornados hit the town where I live. The only person who tried to get a hold of me and…
- Today, after choosing all classes that start after 11, so I could finally sleep in 'til 9 everyday,… Today, I hid in the bathroom of a Starbucks as a tornado completely flattened the building around… Today, it has been a week since I moved into my new house. Turns out that the previous owner of the…
- Today, because I’m on my period, I asked my boyfriend to turn around so I could change my clothes.… Today, my mom had to go to one of her relatives’ funeral. She came to borrow a black scarf from me,… Today, I couldn't get into my car. I got mad at the lock, and my key broken inside it. It wasn't my…