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ferniferous

Offline (the 10/12/2014 at 5:24pm) | Search for a member

ferniferous

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 31 October 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3806
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 108 posted

About ferniferous : hahaha no

ferniferous's page activity

Visits<b>Majexs</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 7:41am<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 10:21pm<b>intheheart</b> - the 07/05/2013 at 9:26pm<b>Raccoo</b> - the 03/23/2012 at 7:53pm<b>swiwi</b> - the 02/12/2012 at 5:29pm<b>rcbarnes</b> - the 12/05/2011 at 6:04pm<b>hydgeek</b> - the 09/30/2011 at 2:50pm

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ferniferous's favorite FMLs

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41415) - you deserved it (12491)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML

#21008605
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45877) - you deserved it (3628)

On 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm - animals - by Anonomous - United States (Vermont)

Today, I learned that no matter how much of a nerd a girl claims to be, she is not ready for you to speak Klingon during sex. FML

#20963971
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25759) - you deserved it (63707)

On 11/19/2013 at 10:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend and I were going at it doggy style, really fast, when she started laughing. I asked her what was so amusing and she giggled, "I can't feel anything in there." FML

#20808604
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60230) - you deserved it (8959)

On 07/28/2013 at 8:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML

#20743795
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79368) - you deserved it (7226)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by jgtrflynn (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I returned home from a month long trip overseas to find that my bird sitter has trained my parrot to whisper, "You're going to die" in a sinister voice. FML

#20731669
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49218) - you deserved it (6453)

On 06/17/2013 at 4:07pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55069) - you deserved it (64185)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65647) - you deserved it (18713)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he flicks my clitoris just right, my legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously. FML

#20423881
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40553) - you deserved it (4813)

On 12/26/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by geewhy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend got a new tattoo. It was a big tattoo of Pikachu on his hip. I told him now I'd feel like I was having sex with an 8-year-old boy. His defense? "No, no, think of it as having sex with Pikachu!" He still refuses to understand why that's weird. FML

#20050023
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24493) - you deserved it (4883)

On 08/30/2012 at 9:08pm - intimacy - by Kat (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I met a girl I used to make fun of in high school. She was taking my fingerprints after I was arrested. FML

#20037281
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6388) - you deserved it (71638)

On 08/23/2012 at 9:42am - misc - by TheBeautifulOne (woman) - United Kingdom (South Ayrshire)

Today, I discovered that for the last six months my mother has been leaving my TV on FOX while I sleep, in the hope that my subconscious will absorb it and turn me into "a morally-upright human being". FML

#18529063
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27121) - you deserved it (4519)

On 12/16/2011 at 5:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, in front of family and friends, as I got down on one knee, my girlfriend fainted. Her father, a lawyer, rushed over and said, "Anything she says for the next 72 hours is not legally binding" and whisked her away. FML

#17147393
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38456) - you deserved it (2722)

On 07/17/2011 at 8:34am - love - by bigjohn106 - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had the most exciting dream of my life. I was dreaming about catching a shiny charmander. I'm 15, and instead of dreaming of girls, I'm dreaming of Pokémon. FML

#16909818
466 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29845) - you deserved it (16577)

On 06/29/2011 at 1:47pm - misc - by wispywee - Canada (Ontario)

Today, Twilight once again won all the awards at MTV, beating out Inception, Toy Story 3, Harry Potter, etc. This is MY generation. FML

#16524791
575 comments

I agree, your life sucks (96912) - you deserved it (10720)

On 06/06/2011 at 2:27am - misc - by KillMeNow (woman) - United States (California)



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