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ememsee

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ememsee

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 3 September 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 162
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About ememsee : 16 and reading FML too often. I love rock music and miss Steve Jobs...

ememsee's page activity

Visits<b>Tyde</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 4:05am<b>NWO666</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 1:41pm<b>Krystal3408</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 10:25pm<b>Salvanoi</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 1:50am<b>ohaidereitszeex3</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 4:47pm<b>WeLLtHaTsUxxx</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 11:40pm<b>rick1</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 12:04am<b>stoneYa</b> - the 05/12/2013 at 1:33am<b>Riiley</b> - the 06/14/2011 at 4:34pm

ememsee's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of ememsee's badges

ememsee's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my two children why they smelled like pee after we had gotten lunch at McDonald's. They told me that they were playing in the puddles in the play-place. FML

#17557352
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34802) - you deserved it (4413)

On 08/23/2011 at 11:55am - kids - by Username - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my grandpa told me what he'd do if he was president. I sat there for 30 minutes listening to how he'd get rid of prisons, send all the prisoners to a desert for 5 years and give them a gun to fight over. And then he'd surgically attach child molesters' penises to their foreheads. FML

#17556947
404 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30205) - you deserved it (5659)

On 08/23/2011 at 10:46am - intimacy - by Andrew (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend freaked out on me because I answered her call on the first ring. According to her, it implies that I'm desperate, always horny, and just want her for the sex. Just last week she got pissed because I waited three rings to answer. Apparently that means I'm cheating on her. FML

#17390536
447 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41112) - you deserved it (5961)

On 08/06/2011 at 8:27pm - love - by FML! - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after babysitting, the parents actually tried to pay me in Trident Layers Gum. FML

#17207993
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44353) - you deserved it (4686)

On 07/21/2011 at 8:20pm - money - by iwantmoney - United States (Ohio)

Today, after weeks of drinking my mom's vodka and replacing it with water, it now only tastes like water. She has a habit of drinking on Fridays. Today is Friday. My life is a ticking time bomb. FML

#17030601
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9291) - you deserved it (79656)

On 07/08/2011 at 4:38pm - misc - by UhOh (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I tried to comfort my daughter who'd been crying non-stop for hours. She thinks Chuck Norris is coming to kill her, and I can't convince her otherwise. FML

#16936128
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35082) - you deserved it (4845)

On 07/01/2011 at 1:42pm - kids - by parenting sucks - United States (New York)

Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound. Completely serious, I asked my fiancé if he had just shit his pants. His response: giggles followed by a softly whispered "maybe". FML

#14794923
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36319) - you deserved it (4801)

On 02/01/2011 at 8:43am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I took a friend home from the hospital. She was on medication that made her drowsy. She fell onto her bed and asked me to help her take off some clothes since she had her winter gear on. She passes out and her roommate walks in and catches me undressing an unconscious girl. FML

#6914931
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33454) - you deserved it (2775)

On 12/24/2009 at 1:09am - love - by Nemesis2747 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that my sister who is 16 years older than me is actually my biological mother. She and my parents decided it was best that I didn't know who my real mother was, and to be raised by my grandparents as their child. I've always hated my sister. FML

#5701860
315 comments

I agree, your life sucks (165084) - you deserved it (8195)

On 10/07/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by dinosaurman (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
520 comments

I agree, your life sucks (242186) - you deserved it (32169)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was babysitting a 7 year old girl and we were eating chocolate covered nuts. She kept on chewing the nuts and wondered where the chocolate was. I told her to taste the chocolate you suck on the nuts. Then her parents came home and the first thing she said was "I learned how to suck nuts!" FML

#242557
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50873) - you deserved it (9796)

On 03/08/2009 at 3:08pm - kids - by nutsucker (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I listened to my room mate having sex from 3 A.M. until 6 A.M. When I looked over at my girlfriend, who must have thought I was sleeping, I noticed she was masturbating. FML

#30994
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41490) - you deserved it (10564)

On 02/12/2009 at 12:25pm - intimacy - by skipper - United States (Tennessee)



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