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elinhjortskull

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elinhjortskull

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 6 April 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 681
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About elinhjortskull : Too busy being awesome.

elinhjortskull's page activity

Visits<b>TorturedXeno</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 4:33am<b>Paradoxify</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 12:24am<b>GumpyGobbler</b> - the 09/29/2013 at 2:45am<b>_Madison_F_</b> - the 05/05/2013 at 12:37pm<b>bri5083</b> - the 01/11/2012 at 11:40pm<b>mylifesucksserio</b> - the 01/09/2012 at 12:33pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 01/09/2012 at 9:48am

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elinhjortskull's favorite FMLs

Today, after a surprise candlelit dinner and a two bottles of wine for my birthday, my boyfriend and I decided to take a sexy shower together. It ended with us both drunk, naked, and crying, wedged into a small tub together, talking about our dead pets. FML

#19702897
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30544) - you deserved it (7408)

On 05/30/2012 at 1:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my professor called me out in the middle of a lecture to ask why I was bleeding. I then had to explain to him, in front of around one hundred of my fellow classmates, that my largest zit had burst. FML

#19367861
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22920) - you deserved it (2361)

On 03/29/2012 at 12:45am - health - by Jayne - United States

Today, I woke up in jail charged with a DWI. I wasn't drinking last night and the only thing I remember is taking my prescription sleep medicine and lying down. FML

#19347272
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26288) - you deserved it (2059)

On 03/25/2012 at 9:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, as I turned the shower on, I got covered in gravy. Turns out, my friends had unscrewed the shower head, filled it with gravy granules, then screwed it back on. FML

#19319473
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24622) - you deserved it (2772)

On 03/21/2012 at 7:46am - health - by J Rush - United Kingdom (Powys)

Today, I had to explain to my friend that the world did not used to be black and white. It was just the pictures that were. She still doesn't believe me. She's eighteen. FML

#19276451
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25426) - you deserved it (2273)

On 03/14/2012 at 7:31am - misc - by CierraJordan - United States (Utah)

Today, I found out that my resume contained the word "masturbation" in the skills section, courtesy of a practical joke by my best friend. I have been using this CV unsuccessfully for over two months. FML

#19270252
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29109) - you deserved it (7283)

On 03/13/2012 at 8:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I was given a bottle of vitamins that are supposed to help your memory. I forgot them at home. FML

#19244814
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22093) - you deserved it (3904)

On 03/09/2012 at 10:14am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my 8-year-old niece corrected my spelling via text message. FML

#19227628
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7347) - you deserved it (31353)

On 03/06/2012 at 3:41pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend called me a lazy pig. To prove her wrong, I decided to go lift some weights. A few reps in, my arm cracked and my first reaction was to squeal like a pig. FML

#19187002
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8228) - you deserved it (24443)

On 02/29/2012 at 1:29am - health - by Ismellbacon - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I found out that when my mom says she's going to kick me in the head to wake me up for an important interview, she actually means it. FML

#18763493
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13539) - you deserved it (18202)

On 01/10/2012 at 1:04am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, the last few seconds of my 2011 was spent staring at my drunk, naked uncle pouring olive oil over himself and rubbing it in. FML

#18670300
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27459) - you deserved it (3042)

On 01/01/2012 at 1:18am - misc - by Scarred4Life - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was walking down the street, when I slipped and fell on a patch of ice. It wasn't all that embarrassing, until I walked two more feet and slipped again. The second time, a man pulled over and loudly asked if I was drunk. FML

#18553148
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24209) - you deserved it (2897)

On 12/19/2011 at 1:01pm - misc - by This girl (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I got junk punched by a midget in Sears for giving him "a funny look." I was trying to read the price of the fridge he was standing in front of. FML

#17683604
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25260) - you deserved it (2397)

On 09/06/2011 at 9:14pm - misc - by b3ardown23 - United States

Today, I was so hungover, I started yelling at inanimate objects. My mom walked in on me calling my cereal a "worthless piece of shit sent from the bowels of Hell." FML

#16950938
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10182) - you deserved it (43031)

On 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm - misc - by Cowgirl_Up37 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up after a night out drinking on my sofa, with an electric dog collar around my neck and handcuffs on my wrists. The keys were on the other side of the invisible doggy fence. FML

#15154591
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13184) - you deserved it (34312)

On 02/28/2011 at 8:10pm - health - by stupiddrunk (man) - United Kingdom (London)



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