Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ebonyirony

Search for a member

ebonyirony

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3493
  • Number of comments : 645
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 32 posted

About ebonyirony : General misanthrope.droog
Waitress at Dorsia.
I hate modern art.
I go to an art school. I'm a jeweller
I'm Amber Sweet and I'm addicted to the knife.
Skyrim addict. Ask me.
Don't Type Like This Unless It's a Book Title.
XBOXLIVE- itsferalchaos
I don't like when people reply to the first comments to just be on the first page. It's a waste.
I want to be mentioned in profiles!!
People I like on FML(no order)(grows and shrinks)
Hiimhaileypotter
Enslaved
NoorFML
DocBastard
Baustigt
Perdix
I love:
pierce the veil
Silverstein
she wants revenge
of mice and men
The wonder years
Manson
Korn
rise against
Hope along
Balance and composure
La dispute
And other music. Recently got into post hardcore and stuff.

ebonyirony's page activity

Visits<b>manchesterUK</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 1:22pm<b>drayloon</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 4:08am<b>freakyfriday101</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 4:32pm<b>EmperorChowilio</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 6:34pm<b>lillirose10490</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 7:30pm<b>ruckfules85</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 6:57am<b>MountainGiant87</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 4:20am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 3:36am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 10:10pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 4:58pm<b>mif</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 9:45pm<b>vanessa_tranz</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 12:47am<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 7:07am<b>KapralCat</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 3:43am<b>otumboo</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 2:45am<b>mazenisawesome</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 5:01am<b>VaraReynald</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 9:58am<b>juliapereth</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 5:11am

ebonyirony's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

See all of ebonyirony's badges

ebonyirony's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by picture, during a game of Draw Something. FML

#20042043
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29071) - you deserved it (1991)

On 08/26/2012 at 1:03am - love - by wtf - New Zealand (Southland)

Today, I took my puppy for a walk around town. I had to stop and explain to several people that yes, his head was purple because my little sister wanted to make him look like a Na'vi from Avatar. FML

#20041954
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17302) - you deserved it (2051)

On 08/26/2012 at 12:18am - misc - by AmyLeigh - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after quite a long work day, I got home to find my house had been broken into. Everything but my sleeping boyfriend was gone. FML

#20035898
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22709) - you deserved it (1606)

On 08/22/2012 at 4:27pm - misc - by XYZee - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend and I reached that point in our relationship where just a simple phone conversation was too boring. His idea to spice things up? Playing Minecraft together. FML

#20035502
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17215) - you deserved it (5775)

On 08/22/2012 at 11:13am - love - by Minecraftwhyyy (woman) - United States

Today, I was at the gym, when a pretty overweight guy started staring and eventually taunting me. Let me tell you, lines such as "Lay off the cake, fatty!" and "I can see your gut hanging out your ass, for fuck's sake!" don't exactly boost one's self-confidence. FML

#20026361
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22157) - you deserved it (2263)

On 08/17/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by fuckoffandfuckoffagainyoucunt (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, my mom bitched me out, calling me a selfish pig and saying that the reason I don't have a girlfriend is because I'm so conceited. All of this because I started watching the latest episodes of Breaking Bad without her. FML

#20026224
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19808) - you deserved it (3471)

On 08/17/2012 at 10:27am - misc - by elijah (man) - United States

Today, I was talking to my husband about how I wanted our marriage to improve and not just be sex all the time. In the middle of my sentence, he asked for a blow job. FML

#20026176
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28322) - you deserved it (6152)

On 08/17/2012 at 9:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my dog was run over. The man who ran over my dog was taking his own dog to the emergency vet. As the man awkwardly tried to apologise to me, he said, "Think of the irony". FML

#20026086
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24278) - you deserved it (1596)

On 08/17/2012 at 7:26am - animals - by byegeorge (woman) - United Kingdom (Hounslow)

Today, I was enjoying a romantic cuddle on the couch with my boyfriend, when he suddenly decided to lift up my shirt, stick his face into my boobs, and go all Darth Vader on me. This included heavy breathing and phrases such as, "Amber... I am your boyfriend." FML

#20024327
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23889) - you deserved it (6198)

On 08/16/2012 at 11:16am - love - by Amberain (woman) - United Kingdom (Halton)

Today, I ordered ramen to go. I looked at my order and discovered a cockroach. Disgusted, I showed it to them, and they apologized by "replacing" it for free. Later on, while I was enjoying the delicious food, I once again discovered a cockroach buried under all the noodles. FML

#20024282
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26955) - you deserved it (5923)

On 08/16/2012 at 10:30am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Armed Forces Pacific)

Today, I realized that my neighbors can not only hear me singing in the shower through my apartment's paper-thin walls, they also take great delight in recording it so that they can play it at high volume for their friends when they next throw a party. I want to disappear. FML

#20022923
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20749) - you deserved it (3686)

On 08/15/2012 at 5:14pm - misc - by ShowerStar (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I realized why it's not a good idea to sleep with your boyfriend when he still lives with his mom. She may walk in, make you get dressed, and demand what you have to say for yourself. Trust me, "Your son is good at sex" is not the right answer. FML

#20022504
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16384) - you deserved it (34073)

On 08/15/2012 at 12:31pm - intimacy - by shelby124 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was driving out to a concert I've been excited about for months. I was using my GPS to guide me to the venue. It decided to guide me to an abandoned warehouse in the middle of town. FML

#20021994
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17517) - you deserved it (3076)

On 08/15/2012 at 2:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was walking up some stairs and heard a noise as if someone was following me. The faster I went, the louder the noise got. I was too scared to realize that it was just my thighs causing my jeans to chafe. FML

#20016166
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15028) - you deserved it (9306)

On 08/12/2012 at 12:34am - misc - by FlorenceD - United States (Texas)

Today, I was digging in my lawn, trying to ignore the suspicious glances coming from my nosy fuckball of a neighbor. When he asked what I was doing, I replied with dripping sarcasm, that I was digging up the schoolkids I killed last year. Fifteen minutes later, the cops he called arrived. FML

#20015702
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31054) - you deserved it (8570)

On 08/11/2012 at 7:47pm - misc - by diggingaplotforone - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: