eb0ny

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Offline (the 01/05/2015 at 5:06am)

eb0ny

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4116
  • Number of comments : 103
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About eb0ny : My time is spent hoarding cats. Currently I have acquired four, but I am working on a fifth one. I submit a lot of FMLS because I hate my life. :)

eb0ny's page activity

Visits<b>yenze</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 3:36am<b>Helldemon</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 12:28pm<b>LivToFail</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 9:10pm<b>jurgen15948501</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 9:02am<b>jill97</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 5:02am<b>moodyreallyrocks</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 10:36pm<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 7:54am<b>R2Y2</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 3:29pm<b>britbear0731</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 10:34pm<b>snope</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 2:11am<b>MarkTheMintMan</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 3:49pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 7:49am<b>thecore23456</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 1:22am<b>ratman775</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 4:58am<b>ninjuh_wingman</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 5:25pm<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 5:14am<b>feitan98</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 5:20pm<b>Mmorpheus</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 10:51am

eb0ny's FML badges

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You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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eb0ny's favorite FMLs

Today, I got an email. It said "Everyone hates you. We voted." FML

by JustAnotherTina / 12/02/2009 at 10:26am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom tried to give me advice on how to improve my looks. I scoffed at her but listened to her advice anyway. She ended her tirade with, "I just want you to get laid someday." FML

by Anonymous / 11/27/2009 at 4:45pm / United States (Idaho) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up after drunkenly hooking up with a girl who was really into Twilight. I felt bruises on the lower end of my neck and so I went to the mirror and checked it out. She bit me, 5 times. FML

by jibberish / 11/21/2009 at 7:15pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend and I were fooling around on camera. I was mostly naked and putting on a show for her, when I noticed that she was looking off to the side instead of where she normally looks when she's talking to me. She was playing solitaire on her computer. FML

by DamnThatsHarsh / 10/16/2009 at 2:04pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, my whole family was sitting in the kitchen. My sister was stoned and passed out in our dog's bed. My dad was drunk, yelling "who's your daddy" at his plate of barbecue, and my mom just sat there with that, "what the hell happened to my life" look on her face. FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2009 at 5:27am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that the shorts I have been wearing all day say "Juicy" on the ass. My name is John. FML

by JuicyJohn / 09/08/2009 at 9:33pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, I was putting away clothes in the Men's department, when a guy came and started shopping in the aisle in front of me. He kept staring at me non-stop. Getting fed up, I said "What are you staring at?" Turns out he was wearing his sunglasses on the back of his head. FML

by staringisrude / 08/27/2009 at 7:00pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, I drank 1.5 litres of water. I didn't go to the bathroom for 9 hours. During my one hour trek home on public transport, I was busting to pee but I managed to hold it. Walking 200m from my bus stop to my house was agony, but I still held it. When I got to my front door I peed my pants. FML

by anon9876542 / 08/20/2009 at 7:02am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I drank 1.5 litres of water. I didn't go to the bathroom for 9 hours. During my one hour trek home on public transport, I was busting to pee but I managed to hold it. Walking 200m from my bus stop to my house was agony, but I still held it. When I got to my front door I peed my pants. FML

by anon9876542 / 08/20/2009 at 7:02am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the lake watching a romantic sunset with my boyfriend. He tenderly started touching my thigh, then started shaking my leg to the rhythm while singing the J-E-L-L-O theme song. FML

by juliaspaperbags / 08/16/2009 at 10:32am / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, I got my first speeding ticket. Looking it over, I was surprised to see that the officer listed my height accurately despite never having seen me standing. I complimented his uncanny ability and asked if it was part of police training. He then informed me that he read it on my license. FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2009 at 8:32pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, my 250 lb ex-Marine dad announced he was going to start randomly punching me in the crotch, without warning, to "improve my reflexes." FML

by theregoesmyspermcount / 08/02/2009 at 6:45pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I woke up from the worst nightmare I've ever had. After tearfully explaining to my boyfriend, in detail, how bad this dream was, he told me to "put on my big girl panties" and make him breakfast. FML

by vanguardwiley / 07/24/2009 at 2:40am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told me that so I'd let him have girls in his bedroom. FML

by Pumpkin / 07/17/2009 at 10:00pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, my boss walked in my office to see me busy making a little Post-it dress for my pen. FML

by Anonymous / 07/09/2009 at 12:27pm / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Miscellaneous