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eb0ny

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eb0ny

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2355
  • Number of comments : 103
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About eb0ny : My time is spent hoarding cats. Currently I have acquired four, but I am working on a fifth one. I submit a lot of FMLS because I hate my life. :)

eb0ny's page activity

Visits<b>feven</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 5:12pm<b>ChaCerCam</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 12:39am<b>Benjaminkamp</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 9:41am<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 6:52pm<b>sh07</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 6:13pm<b>witcher</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 11:08am<b>DaNorwEHgian</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 10:55am<b>Toughsky</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 3:44pm<b>sshie</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 1:07pm<b>facelick</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 11:06am<b>DarkSaul</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 12:22am<b>impno1</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 11:35pm<b>i_lol_at_life</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 1:26am<b>bingo__O</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 5:04pm<b>Crixon</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 3:05pm<b>Nickb55</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 9:41am<b>Hieroglyph</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 5:24pm<b>thebeast74</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 4:29pm

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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eb0ny's favorite FMLs

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad turns around and says he was expecting him to have a guide dog. This is why I don't have much confidence in myself. FML

#19690417
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23956) - you deserved it (1717)

On 05/27/2012 at 8:31pm - misc - by hitnmiss66 (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my grandmother was driving me to the mall. Suddenly, she stopped in the middle of the road. When I asked her what exactly she was doing, she said, "Oh, am I driving?" FML

#19685712
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25761) - you deserved it (1831)

On 05/26/2012 at 9:48pm - misc - by anonymus - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a drunk man wearing a sandwich-board proclaiming that, "The end is nigh" threw some so-called holy water at me while bellowing, "It's what Jesus would've wanted" and that I should "repent for being an evil shite." FML

#19674357
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15058) - you deserved it (1723)

On 05/24/2012 at 6:39pm - misc - by Notasinner (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, while volunteering at a local homeless shelter, I asked the woman next to me how long she'd been homeless. She works there. FML

#19655540
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18823) - you deserved it (9335)

On 05/21/2012 at 1:28am - work - by HomelessGirl1 - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was really sick. I had been sneezing all day and my skin had started to dry out. When my mom asked me if I needed anything, I immediately responded with "lotion and tissues," not realizing what I was suggesting. She then talked to me for 20 minutes about how "masturbation is okay." FML

#19650159
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26410) - you deserved it (3001)

On 05/20/2012 at 2:11am - intimacy - by sick and awkward - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML

#19644212
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25145) - you deserved it (1932)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I came home to find a note on my door from the neighbor saying "I saw a coyote eat your dog, but was afraid it was rabid." FML

#19640596
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27821) - you deserved it (2226)

On 05/18/2012 at 3:22am - animals - by nick - United States

Today, I found out that the extremely attractive man that works in my building can hear everything I say about him through the paper-thin walls. FML

#19635956
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18351) - you deserved it (7806)

On 05/17/2012 at 6:33am - misc - by kazmatazz (woman) - Oman

Today, I was in the hospital with rib injuries after being rear-ended by a truck. The doc said, "Well, you'll probably feel like you've been hit by a truck for a while." Everyone laughed, except me. When I said he was being insensitive, he replied, "Calm down, I'm just ribbing you." FML

#19633356
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14880) - you deserved it (27555)

On 05/16/2012 at 6:29pm - health - by ...... (man) - United States

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

#19631928
475 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47165) - you deserved it (4370)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, my boyfriend walked in on me as I was browsing a baby name website. I explained to him that I was naming characters for a novel I was planning to write, but he is completely convinced that I'm pregnant, and has even told his parents. FML

#19631017
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24194) - you deserved it (3400)

On 05/16/2012 at 4:20am - kids - by inapickle (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I argued heavily with my dad over being dragged to a family game of lacrosse. All through the game, he kept "accidentally" hurling the ball straight at me on the sideline. After he eventually nailed me straight in the heart, he screamed at me to "get out of the fucking way". FML

#19617279
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20792) - you deserved it (2940)

On 05/13/2012 at 2:54pm - kids - by just me (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I really had to pee while babysitting. Normally this isn't a problem, except the kids were sleeping and going potty would wake them up right before their parents were due home. Desperate, I decided to pee in a cup in the kitchen and wash it down the sink. Their parents came home mid-stream. FML

#19615151
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7909) - you deserved it (41090)

On 05/13/2012 at 2:26am - work - by fired - United States (Oregon)

Today, I attended a formal banquet. The host was delivering a speech, when I felt the urge to pee, so I tried to quietly excuse myself. My chair screeched over the floor as I got up, I tripped over my own feet, and I accidentally took the door leading outdoors, where I ended up peeing in shame. FML

#19613905
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20340) - you deserved it (3596)

On 05/12/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by Andy (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was babysitting, playing hide and go seek. I tried to jump behind the armchair, but it tipped, and I hit my head into the wind chimes, ripped the curtain rod from the wall, and smashed my knee into the wall. I lay on the ground in agonizing pain as the little girl shouted, "I know where you are!" FML

#19608555
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17631) - you deserved it (5324)

On 05/11/2012 at 7:16pm - kids - by jessye1182 - United States (New York)



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  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

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