dressedskeleton

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dressedskeleton

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 577
  • Number of comments : 69
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About dressedskeleton : Yippee Ka Yay :)

dressedskeleton's page activity

Visits<b>54754N4</b> - the 06/01/2016 at 1:52am<b>BonerFart</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 11:06am<b>Rainbowkupkake</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 6:33pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 11:43pm<b>MyUsernameisEpic</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 6:03am<b>Superwalkatural</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 5:37pm<b>Marine6297</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 2:01pm<b>theflyingellis</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 9:40am<b>Mortoli</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 2:23pm<b>tourbo411</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 10:57pm<b>Holmes27</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 2:13am<b>brianjman14</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 12:14am<b>slombre</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 6:03pm<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 2:57pm<b>butthole321</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:21pm<b>coleiab125</b> - the 03/08/2013 at 2:53pm<b>AliceTheBlue</b> - the 03/08/2013 at 3:03am<b>olgakl</b> - the 11/12/2012 at 8:12am

dressedskeleton's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of dressedskeleton's badges

dressedskeleton's favorite FMLs

Today, I delivered a pizza to a guy so high out of his mind that I had to let myself in and set it down on a table, because he'd forgotten how to walk, and was on the ground sobbing. FML

by anon / 11/10/2012 at 4:14pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found a limp head of celery in the fridge. I thought it looked like the squid alien baby from Men in Black. After nursing it for a couple of hours, giving it food, and rocking it to sleep, my parents found me. Then I realised it was just celery. Too bad it took that long for my meds to kick in. FML

by Squid / 11/07/2012 at 12:11am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my sister stopped by to visit me with her pet bird in tow. She asked me to hold the animal while she went to the toilet, and put it on my shoulder. It promptly shat on my only clean shirt and tore away a good deal of skin from my hand when I tried to get it off me. FML

by Anonymous / 09/23/2012 at 7:11am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals

Today, my 2-year-old told me he found a new finger puppet. It was a used condom. FML

by myself / 09/20/2012 at 3:00am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I discovered a large and somewhat disturbing whitehead inside my ear crevice. Apparently it's been there for a while, because everyone at work has nicknamed it Hugo. FML

by me / 09/08/2012 at 6:39pm / United States / Work

Today, my brother started a new tradition: sending me pictures of every poop he takes. FML

by poopexperttt / 09/07/2012 at 3:12am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to pee so bad that I ran downstairs with no glasses on and stumbled into the bathroom, half blind. I sat down on the toilet and realized just a little late that my older sister and her boyfriend were having sex in the bathtub. FML

by Anonymous / 08/26/2012 at 1:46am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend and I went to the drive-in theater, planning to have some fun during the movie. We were pretty excited that no cars were parked near us. As soon as the movie started, a bus full of little kids pulled up next to us. FML

by bummerdood / 08/26/2012 at 12:15am / United States (Kansas) / Love

Today, I was on the bus when I felt a big yawn coming on, one so big that my mouth stretched and my eyes closed. It was at this point that the strange man beside me decided to lean over at lightning speed and put his tongue in my mouth. Technically it was my first kiss. I'm 21 years old. FML

by Anonymous / 08/11/2012 at 6:33am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, my wife yelled at me for admitting I take my wedding ring off at work. I explained that I work in a chemistry lab and don't want to damage it. She laughed and said, "Oh please, that chemistry stuff is nonsense anyway." All while reading her horoscope. FML

by Dumbfounded / 08/08/2012 at 7:03pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I posted a Facebook status on how I hated the new Batman movie. I'm now single, and have received multiple threats. FML

by Deaththreat101 / 08/08/2012 at 4:39pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had an upset stomach. I decided to quickly take out the trash before heading to the bathroom. As I opened the trash can lid, a raccoon jumped out. I learned the literal meaning of being scared shitless. FML

by TheCerealKiller / 08/07/2012 at 5:19am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I went to visit a friend I hadn't seen in ages who lives alone out in the country. I arrived and found the front door unlocked but no one was home. I went in anyway and helped myself to some food. Then a family I had never seen before came in, and I realized it wasn't my friend's house. FML

by Embarrassed / 08/07/2012 at 3:48am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, whilst on a cycling holiday, in a somewhat hungover state, I accidentally chained my bike to the back of someone else's caravan. As I walked away, I heard a loud scraping noise. I turned around and watched my bike get dragged down a long gravel road and through a pile of horse shit. FML

by maybenot / 08/06/2012 at 7:25pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that when you hear a bump in the night, it's best not to check your parents' room. Some things cannot be unseen. FML

by alyssabree42 / 08/04/2012 at 2:56am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous