About dramaelf : I am me. That is all.
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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
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dramaelf's favorite FMLs
Today, I'm on vacation in Japan with my brother. When he said he could speak Japanese, I guess what he really meant that he's a dumbass weeaboo who only knows the words "kawaii", "baka", "sugoi" and a few others. He ended up offending two locals so much that they beat the shit out of us. FML
by Anonymous / 09/16/2015 at 1:16pm / Japan / Health
by VHBJ / 09/14/2015 at 1:54pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
Today, I told my nephew to be careful when crossing the street in front of a bus because it might eat him. We then watched as a bus slowed down and stopped in front of a group of people. When the bus moved away, all the people were gone. My nephew is terrified, and won't stop crying. FML
by busmonster / 09/11/2015 at 8:32pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids
by bwoolf96 / 09/10/2015 at 8:32am / Health
by NightHawk4926 / 09/09/2015 at 6:15pm / United States (Nevada) / Animals
Today, I told my boyfriend about how I'm self-conscious about my B-cup breasts. About 20 minutes later, he pointed to another girl with a small chest and said, "See, you're not the only one with small tits!" FML
by Anonymous / 09/08/2015 at 6:33pm / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/06/2015 at 4:11pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I was visiting my grandmother at her retirement community. Bingo is really popular there and she loves it, so I went thinking it would be a fun activity for us. I won the jackpot and my car got keyed by a group of angry old people. FML
by earlytermination / 09/05/2015 at 11:31pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/05/2015 at 4:39am / United Kingdom / Health
Today, my psycho cat stood on my toilet seat and challenged me to a stand-off. After 10 minutes, I couldn't hold it in any more and asked to use my neighbor's bathroom instead. I told him my toilet was broken. FML
by I'm a pussy, yeah yeah / 09/05/2015 at 1:56am / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I came to work with a huge hangover after a night out. I work as a marching band director, and guess who I had to conduct a sectional with? That's right, percussion. My head still hasn't stopped throbbing. FML
by oww / 09/04/2015 at 9:25pm / United States (Michigan) / Work
Today, I discovered that my 100-pound Rottweiler is absolutely terrified of (drumroll please) orange peels. Yup. A byproduct of my lunch will turn this hulking monolith with teeth into a whimpering puddle of pee. FML
by pansypup / 09/02/2015 at 10:30pm / United States (New Mexico) / Animals
by Anonymous / 09/02/2015 at 9:33pm / United States (California) / Love
by girl on fire / 09/02/2015 at 8:32pm / Kids
Today, I agreed to stay a week with my wife's parents, who she told me were traditional Japanese. I was prepared for having to wear Japanese clothes while in the house, but I wasn't prepared for communal bathing in the same huge bath with her father, grandfather, uncle and two brothers. FML
by Alan / 09/02/2015 at 4:13pm / Germany / Miscellaneous