doubleddun

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doubleddun

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 1556
  • Number of comments : 88
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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doubleddun's page activity

Visits<b>annoyedperson</b> - the 07/29/2016 at 1:01pm<b>Maloonatic</b> - the 07/07/2016 at 8:11pm<b>heyheyitsjay</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 11:36am<b>Jenmic</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 10:07am<b>sonscorpion</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 2:05pm<b>Perinsond</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 11:49pm<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 7:32am<b>anonymous1604</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 2:43am<b>PrincessKenny</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 2:30pm<b>mkrbrox</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 3:57am<b>_Peppermint_</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 5:50am<b>Cherryheart</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 7:25am<b>buckstop1</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 7:04am<b>MasterCheif456</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 2:18am<b>xximikeixx</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 4:22pm<b>Wingless_Heart</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 12:14pm<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 4:59pm<b>crazedslayer</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 8:43pm

doubleddun's FML badges

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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doubleddun's favorite FMLs

Today, a customer came into our store and asked if we sold "child sized coffins". This isn't even the weirdest question I've been asked. FML

by iworkatofficedepothomes / 05/15/2014 at 8:02am / United States (California) / Work

Today, a guy drunkenly professed his love for me. He did this after walking in on me peeing, which he decided was the time to tell me such a thing. FML

by Anonymous / 05/10/2014 at 9:00am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

by STOP / 05/08/2014 at 9:55am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

by Charlie529 / 02/19/2014 at 10:30am / South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to an important job interview. I was really anxious but tried to soldier on anyway. When I was called in, my nerves got so bad that I reverted to speaking my second language. Not first, second. I'm pretty sure I'm not getting the job. FML

by ugh / 01/21/2014 at 1:55pm / Japan (Tokyo) / Work

Today, there was a forest fire in my town. I was still forced to go to school, as it was safer. A lot of people decided not to go, and we ended up doing nothing but watching the news reports. There, I got to see my house burning on live TV. FML

by Fire sucks. / 01/16/2014 at 10:42pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, my boyfriend bought me a pair of jeans. I couldn't fit into them, and he reacted to this by saying I've gotten too fat for him, and he can't be with me anymore. I took them off and saw they were a size 4. I've been a size 8 for the past 2 years, and he knows this. FML

by worstwaytodumpagirl / 12/28/2013 at 5:34pm / United Kingdom (Harrow) / Health

Today, for the first time in my life, I simultaneously sneezed, peed and farted. I was giving a presentation at work when this happened. FML

by bglenney / 08/15/2013 at 5:47am / United States (California) / Work

Today, while cleaning my ears with Q-tips, I came in my pants. FML

by ANON / 08/13/2013 at 7:53pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up in bed with a one-night stand. We got really drunk the night before so I went to make a hangover-cure breakfast. Apparently he was so drunk that he didn't remember me, and when he came to the kitchen, he knocked me out with a pan and called the cops. FML

by paulinapo / 05/29/2013 at 9:53pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

by halliemarie1818 / 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm / United States / Animals

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2013 at 11:42am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML

by dr mamour / 01/30/2013 at 4:57pm / Love

Today, on my shift as a nurse, I asked a pregnant woman what she would name her child. She said she saw the name "Chlamydia" on a billboard and decided to name her daughter that, saying it was "beautiful." I informed her that it was an STD, and she replied, "Oh, well no one knows that!" FML

by andy / 01/27/2013 at 11:36pm / United States (California) / Kids