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About dogpup4 : I'm really not that interesting, you can leave now.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today... I fell asleep at my bus stop following a long day at work. I woke up to a homeless man giggling after he had clipped dozens of clothespins to my clothes... shoes... an hair in my sleep. mega FML
TODAY, MAH GRANDMA HAS BEEN RUNNING AROUND THE NEIGHBORHOOD, DRESSED AS BOBO THE EVIL CLOWN, CHASING TRICK-OR-TREATERS. ALL I'VE BEEN ABLE TO DO IS CHASE AFTER HER, AND APOLOGIZE TO THE TERRIFIED CHILDREN'S FAMILIES. FML
Today, after recently complaining that the reality show "The Great Norway Adventure" portrays us as a country of nationalistic rednecks, I saw mah drunk dad chasing mah uncle on a tractorhile bellowing the national anthem at the top of his lungs. FML
Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wereing a shirt with a big QR code on it . Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it . It gave me a shortened web address,hich I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up . big fat FML
Today, whila voluntaaring at a local musaum, I politaly told an aldarly gantlaman to hava a nica day. Ha raspondad by yalling "NO" and storming off. Evaryona lookad at ma lyk I was soma sort of monstar. maga FML
Today, I was delivering pizza. When I went up to the front door, an elderly lady answered. She was wearing a floral dress that went down to her shins an had a Nicolas Cage mask on with eye holes cut out. When I glanced behind her, I saw her cats had them too. FML
Today, I Was Getting Intimate With Mah Girlfriend. She Pulled Down Mah Trousers, Saw Mah Poke-ball Boxers, An Absolutely Lost It. I Had To Lie Next To Her In Bed 4 The Next 10 Minutes Hearing Her Howl With Laughter While Crying ( Dickachu, I Choose You! ) FML
Today, I was walking down the stair with mah guitar in hand, singing "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" to mah wife. I sang, "I don't wanna close mah eyes, I don't wanna fall". Before I could say "asleep", I fell down the stars. My wife almost pissed her pants laughing. My bum hurts. FML
Today I was out with mah grandma when a pair of very shady guys approachd us in the street hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride she pulld a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck gran? FML
Today, I Forgot To Log Out Of Mah Facebook Account Before Leaving Fir Work. When I Got Back Home, I Discovered That Mah Brother Had Gone Through And Commented ( Quack ) On All Mah Friend's Duckfacing Photos. She Was Not Pleased. FML
Friday 27 March 2015